Romantic love, falling head over heels in love - is different. For the most part, it's really just a chemical reaction. And that lovely reaction typically will only last a few months into a relationship. That intense, I MUST BREATH HIS/HER AIR ALL DAY type of feelings starts to calm down and we get into (hopefully) a happy pattern.Can't fall in love? But a life without love, that-that-that's terrible!
Buttercup: You can't hurt me. Westley and I are joined by the bonds of love. And you cannot track that, not with a thousand bloodhounds, and you cannot break it, not with a thousand swords.
Romance then takes a different course than the first courting days/honeymoon of the relationship. This romance is done to keep the other person interested. And yes, some of us get lazy about this once those lovely wedding bands are on (or whatever you use to symbolize your love), because we feel secure in our relationship. And then comes kids (for many, but not all) and if you do have kids, well the WHOLE and ENTIRE relationship changes. Life completely changes. And romance can get totally thrown to the way side. And then, again hopefully, the couple realizes shit needs to change and attempts to go back to romance.
However, after so long and so much, how do you romance your partner all over again? My suggestion, and it is ONLY a suggestion, is start fresh with your loved one. Change things up, because both have changed.
Romantic love should lead into a true love, love so deep that you can breathe on your own and still feel the love for your partner. Love that binds you, makes you feel whole.
[singing] Why does my heart cry? Feelings I can't fight. You're free to leave me, but just don't decieve me. And please, believe me when I say I love you.
And that deeply rooted love, is (I think) made possible by talking, touching and knowing. Always talking, to each other, with each other. Touching, simple affection, can go a long ways to keeping you connected. And knowing? Well, knowing that you do love the other, that you want to continue to love them and still love yourself.
I know there is more I want to write, but I think that for now, this segment is done.
Just keep in mind...
Getting In Touch with your INNER BITCH
"It's better to have loved and lost than to live with an idiot for the rest of your life"
I'm using partner instead of spouse because not every can or want to get married to who they love.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2012/dec/13/what-is-love-five-theories http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/love-without-limits/201111/what-is-love http://www.huffingtonpost.com/sheryl-paul/what-is-love_2_b_1446105.html