What a week!

This week, wow, has been so incredibly busy and crazy and with so much going on with everyone I care about.

But seriously, I am not sure if it was the new moon this week or what, but whatever was going on affected everyone. Thankfully things are starting to even out and there are more positive outcomes happening, so that's good. Stay focused on the good, on the positive and keep moving forward.

For more good news, I did an egg fast and stuck to it and lost 12 lbs. Holy Fuck. Yes, it's a lot of water weight, but it's also a great way to jump start back into a healthy life style and keep on losing weight and figuring out healthy options. I love that more places offer Keto friendly options, both at places to eat like Chipotle and at grocery stores. It really does make it a lot easier to plan and enjoy what you're eating.

Oh and I finally got my period. After literally 73 days. Yesterday the cramps reminded me of high school where I was nauseous and puke-y and the pain was insane. Whereas today, it's been a non-stop flo. Literally since 3 am, and every 3 hours until 10pm tonight, where it's finally starting to slow down a bit. Now, I use one of those menstrual cups, which holds 32ml or 1.08 oz, so far since 3 am it's basically 208 ml or 7 oz - literally today alone. Now, according to google:

"Most women will lose less than 16 teaspoons of blood (80ml) during their period, with the average being around 6 to 8 teaspoons. Heavy menstrual bleeding is defined as losing 80ml or more in each period, having periods that last longer than 7 days, or both. But it's not usually necessary to measure blood loss."

Thankfully my period lasts about 3 full days, but damn, this is one heavy mf right now. Well, at least today's day is heavy.

I am so exhausted, not just from my period, but also from the politics of the day, Covid-19, and people that just can't help but be stupid. I know with the fast this week, sleep has been difficult. It's also been no alcohol, which has been mostly successful. I had 1 sip (SIP) of whiskey, due to my period pain yesterday. But, I need a vacation. Like a nice, week long vacation with nothing good food, drinks, maybe a pool or something. Maybe 2 weeks. My vacation time is mounting, so hopefully sometime soon I can at least a few days in a row. Without having to clean the house or do laundry, or anything else that is a chore.

In other news, I am working on a new tattoo design that will cover up my partially removed moon. I am pretty excited about it. It's nice to have a symbolic and meaningful artful idea for a piece. I've been using my bf's ipad to use the images and add/remove/combine things to it. The next step is find a good (maybe local, maybe not) artist that can do the cover up.

I think it's time to relax, watch some Netflix and think about the dishes that need to be done tomorrow.

I miss my kid

Yes, he's in a good place and on a good path and I know he will be happy and healthy and successful and have amazing new experiences and probably some sketchy ones too...but damn, I just miss my son. I miss his hugs, so very much. I miss his doing the dishes because he knew I was stressed and that he could help. Or even his complaints about the spiders outside.

I am so thankful and lucky that I get to talk to him as much as I do and that in a couple months it may be more difficult. 

I just miss him. 

I love him so much and I am so damn proud of him.