Inositol is POSSIBLY SAFE for most adults. It can cause nausea, tiredness, headache, and dizziness.
Nausea
Fatigue
Headaches
Dizziness.
There are a few less common, but more serious, inositol side effects that you should report to your healthcare provider. These include but are not limited to:
Worsening of bipolar disorder (although this was reported in only one case and may have been caused by other factors)
Signs of an allergic reaction, such as:
Itching
Hives
A rash
Wheezing
Difficulty breathing
Swelling of the mouth or throat.
Some preliminary results of studies on high-dose inositol supplements show promising results for people suffering from problems such as bulimia, panic disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder, agoraphobia, and unipolar and bipolar depression.[18][19][20][21]
In a single double-blind study on 13 patients, Myo-inositol (18 grams daily) has been found to reduce the symptoms of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) significantly, with effectiveness equal to SSRIs and virtually without side-effects.[22] In a double-blind, controlled trial, myo-inositol (18 grams daily) was superior to fluvoxamine for decreasing the number of panic attacks and other side-effects.[20]
Patients suffering from clinical depression, in general, have decreased levels of inositol in their cerebrospinal fluid.[18][19] A double-blind, placebo-controlled study of depressed patients showed that a high dose of inositol (12 grams daily) resulted in significant improvement of symptoms, with no changes noted in liver, kidney, or hematological function.[18][19][21] A meta-analysis of randomized trials of inositol for depression was not able to determine if inositol is of benefit.[23]
Resources:
http://www.webmd.com/vitamins-supplements/ingredientmono-299-INOSITOL.aspx?activeIngredientId=299&activeIngredientName=INOSITOL
http://mental-health.emedtv.com/inositol/inositol-side-effects.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inositol
http://www.nutritional-supplements-health-guide.com/inositol-side-effects.html
8.24.2011
Inositol Side Effects
8.23.2011
Some info on Inositol from Soulcysters.net
http://www.soulcysters.net/showthread.php?306396-DCI-D-Chiro-Inositol-WOW-Part-4&highlight=Inositol+side+effects
Benefits of Myo-Inositol
*Encourges Ovulation in women with absent or irregular menstrual cycles with PCOS
*Decreases Leptin, and helps with Wieght loss in PCOS
*Improves Mood, and can help depression according to studies
*It is really good for your liver
*helps hirsutism
* decreses androgens
*helps Insulin Resistance
*decreases acne
*Lowers total and free testosterone levels
*Improves quality of eggs
Testamonials and threads on Myo-Inositol (there are more on soulcysters.net, but you need to check them out!)
http://forums.obgyn.net/pcos/PCOS.0004/0625.html
What is the best dose for Myo-Inositol?
The studies seem to be based on 2,000 mg or 4,000 mg. While there was one study on 200 mg, I recomend the 2 or 4,ooo mg dose for extra insurance that you will get all the benefits of Myo-I. Starting with 1,000 mg and gradually working your way up to the dose you choose is a good way to do it.
If your BMI is above 37, you will probably need higher doses than 4,000 mg.
Where can I purchase Myo-Inositol?
Myo-Inositol is the fancy name for regular old Inositol supplements, which can be purchased usually at health food and supplement stores, along with online stores. My favorite right now is iherb.com, but Vitacost.com, and luckyvitamin.com are also great
It is available in powder or capsule form. I take powder form, and just swallow water on top. It is not hard to take, it is a sweet powder! Much easier than swallow tons of pills, and cheaper too.
(there are more on soulcysters.net, but you need to check them out!)
http://www.vitacost.com/Twinlab-Inositol-Caps
http://www.vitacost.com/Source-Naturals-Inositol-Powder
http://www.luckyvitamin.com/item/itemKey/49500
How do I take Myo-Inositol?
It is recomended to spread your Myo-I into at least 2 doses, and 3 if possible. Take it 45 minutes to 1 hour before eating on an empty stomach Inositol is water soulable, so drink it with water. I just place the sweet powder on my tounge sometimes, and drink down a nice amount of water. The Myo-I just melts in my mouth! As with DCI, Caffiene Kills MYo- Inositol, and also depletes your Inositol stores in your body.
Should I take both Myo-Inositol and D-chiro Inositol or just one of them?
That is your personal choice, of course. They both have similar results in the studies, and they are both from the inositol family. However I think taking both of them could give you the best results? Myo-Inositol has been proven to help with Wieght loss, and D-chiro Inositol helps with Waist-to-hip ratio. So they both have their special things they do. They both help with Ovulation, lowering testosterone, ect. Myo-Inositol has helped my skin, and is proven to help ance and hair growth.
Alot of poeple are just taking D-chiro Inositol with good results, but a few of us take both Myo-I and DCI. Reading the clinical studies might help you make a decision also.
For myself, I take both D-chiro Inositol and Myo-Inositol. I had been on DCI for a few months, and added in the Myo-Inositol recently and I found additional benefits adding Myo-Insoitol to my regime!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Will be researching for side effects of it tomorrow :)
Benefits of Myo-Inositol
*Encourges Ovulation in women with absent or irregular menstrual cycles with PCOS
*Decreases Leptin, and helps with Wieght loss in PCOS
*Improves Mood, and can help depression according to studies
*It is really good for your liver
*helps hirsutism
* decreses androgens
*helps Insulin Resistance
*decreases acne
*Lowers total and free testosterone levels
*Improves quality of eggs
Testamonials and threads on Myo-Inositol (there are more on soulcysters.net, but you need to check them out!)
http://forums.obgyn.net/pcos/PCOS.0004/0625.html
What is the best dose for Myo-Inositol?
The studies seem to be based on 2,000 mg or 4,000 mg. While there was one study on 200 mg, I recomend the 2 or 4,ooo mg dose for extra insurance that you will get all the benefits of Myo-I. Starting with 1,000 mg and gradually working your way up to the dose you choose is a good way to do it.
If your BMI is above 37, you will probably need higher doses than 4,000 mg.
Where can I purchase Myo-Inositol?
Myo-Inositol is the fancy name for regular old Inositol supplements, which can be purchased usually at health food and supplement stores, along with online stores. My favorite right now is iherb.com, but Vitacost.com, and luckyvitamin.com are also great
It is available in powder or capsule form. I take powder form, and just swallow water on top. It is not hard to take, it is a sweet powder! Much easier than swallow tons of pills, and cheaper too.
(there are more on soulcysters.net, but you need to check them out!)
http://www.vitacost.com/Twinlab-Inositol-Caps
http://www.vitacost.com/Source-Naturals-Inositol-Powder
http://www.luckyvitamin.com/item/itemKey/49500
How do I take Myo-Inositol?
It is recomended to spread your Myo-I into at least 2 doses, and 3 if possible. Take it 45 minutes to 1 hour before eating on an empty stomach Inositol is water soulable, so drink it with water. I just place the sweet powder on my tounge sometimes, and drink down a nice amount of water. The Myo-I just melts in my mouth! As with DCI, Caffiene Kills MYo- Inositol, and also depletes your Inositol stores in your body.
Should I take both Myo-Inositol and D-chiro Inositol or just one of them?
That is your personal choice, of course. They both have similar results in the studies, and they are both from the inositol family. However I think taking both of them could give you the best results? Myo-Inositol has been proven to help with Wieght loss, and D-chiro Inositol helps with Waist-to-hip ratio. So they both have their special things they do. They both help with Ovulation, lowering testosterone, ect. Myo-Inositol has helped my skin, and is proven to help ance and hair growth.
Alot of poeple are just taking D-chiro Inositol with good results, but a few of us take both Myo-I and DCI. Reading the clinical studies might help you make a decision also.
For myself, I take both D-chiro Inositol and Myo-Inositol. I had been on DCI for a few months, and added in the Myo-Inositol recently and I found additional benefits adding Myo-Insoitol to my regime!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Will be researching for side effects of it tomorrow :)
8.07.2011
Inositol - For PCOS
So I have been reading a lot of blogs and forums about PCOS and what other people are taking, (right now my Dr. has me on Metformin 500 g once a day) and as I am pretty much a modern hippy (ie, I like all natural and organic things whenever possible) I wanted to see what others were doing.
Since I will be on vacation soon and not really to deal with the side effects of Metformin, I am switching over to Inositol for the next couple weeks and see if I can progress in my weight loss and to see if it's side effects are the same/better/worse than Metformins. I plan on take 1,000 to start and increasing it as I go and see how I feel :) I am also drinking more teas, specifically: Red Clover, Chasteberry and Raspberry Leaf. All of which are good for your hormones balancing and whatnot :)
Here's a great article about Inositol (source: http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/pcos-diabetes/379227-inositol-pcos-article.html) I highlighted things I thought important in blue
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Another quick list of benefits:
Benefits of Myo-Inositol (source: http://www.soulcysters.net/showthread.php?279619-Myo-inositol-%28not-d-chiro%29-for-pcos)
*Encourges Ovulation in women with absent or irregular menstrual cycles with PCOS
*Decreases Leptin, and helps with Wieght loss in PCOS
*Improves Mood, and can help depression according to studies
*It is really good for your liver
*helps hirsutism
* decreses androgens
*helps Insulin Resistance
*decreases acne
*Lowers total and free testosterone levels
*Improves quality of eggs
Since I will be on vacation soon and not really to deal with the side effects of Metformin, I am switching over to Inositol for the next couple weeks and see if I can progress in my weight loss and to see if it's side effects are the same/better/worse than Metformins. I plan on take 1,000 to start and increasing it as I go and see how I feel :) I am also drinking more teas, specifically: Red Clover, Chasteberry and Raspberry Leaf. All of which are good for your hormones balancing and whatnot :)
Here's a great article about Inositol (source: http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/pcos-diabetes/379227-inositol-pcos-article.html) I highlighted things I thought important in blue
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Inositol and PCOS (article)
Inositol may be important for PCOS women for at least three reasons:
* It may aid insulin action and thus reduce insulin resistance.
* It may help to relieve depression, which is common in polycystic ovary syndrome.
* It helps your liver to metabolize fat.
Inositol is a compound that has nine different forms. The most well-known and nutritionally active form is "myo-inositol", which most people simply refer to as "inositol". It is a necessary component of the membranes of your cells and is vital to many biological processes in your body. It is a precursor to a number of essential "signaling molecules" that instruct cells how to behave.
Some of inositol's signaling is related to activation of serotonin receptors, which could relieve depression and improve appetite balance. Serotonin is a brain chemical with several important functions in the body, including mood and appetite regulation.
Inositol is also a fat-solublizing agent that helps to transport fat from the liver. For those overweight PCOS women who may have a problem with fatty liver congestion, inositol can be helpful.
Although inositol is widely thought of as a member of the B-vitamin family, it is technically not a vitamin because the body can manufacture inositol and is not required to get it from the diet.
Where Does Inositol Come From?
Bacteria in your intestines convert the phytic acid found in plant fibers into inositol, so your body is able to manufacture its own supply of inositol. Phytic acid can be found in fruits, vegetables, legumes, whole grains and nuts.
You can also obtain dietary inositol from animal foods such as beef heart, beef liver and eggs.
Average dietary intake of inositol is about one gram daily. Dietary intake of inositol can influence the levels of inositol in the body and thus may influence biological activities. Inositol supplements may affect behavior and may have anti-depressant and anti-anxiety activities.
D-Chiro Inositol
Another naturally occurring form of inositol is d-chiro-inositol, which has been found to have activity against insulin resistance. However, d-chiro-inositol is not commercially available either as a drug or as a supplement.
It is found in legumes and especially in buckwheat. Consumption of buckwheat concentrate appears to reduce excessively high blood sugar levels and reduce the excretion of d-chiro-inositol in diabetic rats.(1)
D-Chiro Inositol and PCOS
You may have heard that d-chiro-inositol helps to treat polycystic ovarian syndrome. It is thought that it does this by improving insulin sensitivity.
Recent studies have suggested that women with PCOS may have insulin resistance and hyperinsulinemia due to a d-chiro inositol deficiency. D-chiro-inositol has been shown to influence the action of insulin. The amount of chiro-inositol in muscle has been shown to be lower in subjects with type 2 diabetes than in normal people.
A study from the Medical College of Virginia found that 1200 mg. of d-chiro-inositol daily had multiple beneficial effects in the treatment of 22 overweight PCOS women.(2) Not only did it improve the action of insulin, but 86% of the women ovulated during treatment with d-chiro-inositol compared to only 27% in the placebo group. Serum androgen (male hormone) and ovarian androgen production also decreased in the treatment group.
Another study showed similar results in lean PCOS women.(3)
However, there's one big problem: D-chiro-inositol is not commercially available, either as a drug or as a nutritional supplement. (side note, this is now available, you can google it and find it! But it's sorta expensive)
Inositol and PCOS
Since d-chiro inositol is not available, what about ordinary inositol, which is readily available as a nutritional supplement? A recent study suggests that common inositol may be helpful for PCOS and polycystic ovaries.(4)
In this study at the University of Perugia in Italy, 136 PCOS women took inositol (100 mg., twice daily) for 14 weeks. Another group of PCOS women took placebo pills.
The ovulation frequency was significantly higher in the treated group (23%) compared with the placebo (13%). The time in which the first ovulation occurred was significantly shorter (23.6 days) compared with 41.8 days for the placebo group. The number of patients failing to ovulate was higher in the placebo group.
The effect of inositol on follicular maturation was rapid. Also, significant weight loss (and leptin reduction) was recorded in the inositol group, whereas in the placebo group had an increase in weight.
This study suggests a beneficial effect of inositol in improving ovarian function in women with irregular cycles and polycystic ovaries.
Precautions
There are no contraindications for inositol. Inositol supplementation is generally well tolerated. Gastrointestinal effects such as nausea or diarrhea are occasionally reported with high doses. No toxicity has been reported. (Well, I get that anyways with Metformin)
Due to a lack of long-term safety data, inositol should be avoided by pregnant women and nursing mothers. Also, one review article suggested that inositol may stimulate uterine contractions, although no research has demonstrated that inositol actually has this effect.
It's theoretically possible that inositol could worsen hypomanic or manic symptoms of bipolar disorder, so people with this condition should check with their doctor before using supplemental inositol.
Theoretically, high-dose inositol may increase the effects of anti-depressant selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRI drugs) such as fluoxetine sertraline, paroxetine, fluvoxamine and citalopram, and with 5-hydroxytryptamine receptor agonists, such as sumatriptan. If you are taking anti-depressant drugs, consult with your doctor before taking supplemental inositol.
Dosage
According to the study we cited above, PCOS women appeared to get some benefit from a dose of only 200 mg. daily, which is a very moderate amount. Some doctors may recommend 500 mg. twice daily. In contrast, as much as 12 grams (12,000 mg.) has been used in studies to treat depression or panic attacks.
200 - 1,000 mg. per day for PCOS appears to be safe. A considerably higher dose may be appropriate in some situations, but consult with your physician as to how much more you should take. (I have seen other articles and studies where the amount calls for 2,000-4,000 mg. I suggest you do additional research and see what's best for you! )
Inositol is available either in capsules, tablets or in powder form. You can obtain high quality inositol from our PCOS Supplements Store.
Sources:
(1) Kawa, JM et al, Buckwheat concentrate reduces serum glucose in streptozotocin-diabetic rats, J Agric Food Chem. 2003 Dec 3;51(25):7287-91.
(2) Nestler, JE et al, Ovulatory and metabolic effects of D-chiro-inositol in the polycystic ovary syndrome, Engl J Med. 1999 Apr 29;340(17):1314-20.
(3) Iuorno, MJ et al, Effects of d-chiro-inositol in lean women with the polycystic ovary syndrome, Endocr Pract. 2002 Nov-Dec;8(6):417-23.
(4) Gerli S et al, Effects of inositol on ovarian function and metabolic factors in women with PCOS: a randomized double blind placebo-controlled trial, Eur Rev Med Pharmacol Sci. 2003 Nov-Dec;7(6):151-9
http://www.ovarian-cysts-pcos.com/inositol.html
Another quick list of benefits:
Benefits of Myo-Inositol (source: http://www.soulcysters.net/showthread.php?279619-Myo-inositol-%28not-d-chiro%29-for-pcos)
*Encourges Ovulation in women with absent or irregular menstrual cycles with PCOS
*Decreases Leptin, and helps with Wieght loss in PCOS
*Improves Mood, and can help depression according to studies
*It is really good for your liver
*helps hirsutism
* decreses androgens
*helps Insulin Resistance
*decreases acne
*Lowers total and free testosterone levels
*Improves quality of eggs
Labels:
Inositol,
Metformin,
PCOS,
Polycystic Ovarian Disease,
Weight Loss
6.30.2011
Not Just A Witch
So I changed my blog name from FaeryChaos, to Not Just A Witch...
And you may wonder why.
Being a witch is part of who I am. A large part of how I think (love love love Karma), how I feel (Balance) and where I am going in life.
As I was perusing several other blogs today and seeing who they follow (pagan ones today) and I saw a lot of 'witchy' stuff out there, which is to me, full of the awesome. It got me thinking though about me and mine and my Faery Chaos is part of me (Faeries can be some serious little tricksters and not always nice - they bite! Chaos is needed in life, just as much as Order) but all of I sudden I felt this "I'm not just a witch. I'm not just a mom, or just a working mom, or just a wife, or just a sister. I am ALL of those things and then some" and decided to change my blog. Of course, I could have done something like "Not just a Mom" too, but my witchiness was all there so that's what I put.
I may write more on this later, when I actually HAVE time.
And you may wonder why.
Being a witch is part of who I am. A large part of how I think (love love love Karma), how I feel (Balance) and where I am going in life.
As I was perusing several other blogs today and seeing who they follow (pagan ones today) and I saw a lot of 'witchy' stuff out there, which is to me, full of the awesome. It got me thinking though about me and mine and my Faery Chaos is part of me (Faeries can be some serious little tricksters and not always nice - they bite! Chaos is needed in life, just as much as Order) but all of I sudden I felt this "I'm not just a witch. I'm not just a mom, or just a working mom, or just a wife, or just a sister. I am ALL of those things and then some" and decided to change my blog. Of course, I could have done something like "Not just a Mom" too, but my witchiness was all there so that's what I put.
I may write more on this later, when I actually HAVE time.
5.26.2011
Cetaphil vs. Answers From Nature Lotions
In Summary:
Personally, I really perfer to use products that are natural and/or organic when possible. I also want to make sure I am using products that actually work! Who wants to waste money on something that just coats your skin or stripe your hair with crap? (side note: I have been using aromatherapy oils for YEARS and have several books on them and the incredible things that they alone can do is amazing) Of course, some people will think that they are old wives tales or crap or whatever. I use what I know works. Period. I research ingredients, see what other people have said and recommend/not recommend. Every person is different and therefore will react differently. Me, I have very sensitive skin and (now) the Dr. says Eczema (ha, which only just happened with our move to MD - Oh and the Dr. said there is Lime in the water here, so blah) and to be honest, I might get a 2nd opinion on that. (another side note: I can be very lazy, which translates into not actually using anything since I have to run out the door to work - bad me. When I DO use my lotion though - just after my shower, I don't have any problems!!).
So, in other words, I really don't like what I am reading about Cetaphil. My Dr. recommended it because it's the closest thing to steroids that isn't steroids, that is good for Eczema. He would not even hear of me using anything else. He refused to listen, which always makes me cautious. It's not that hard to say "Well, I don't know, why don't you bring it on your next appointment and let me look at it." - OR - ask for the website/info about it. I know Dr's are busy, but seriously, we are ALL busy.
(Side STORY about Dr's in my town: A couple years when we first moved here, my kid got a UTI (he's not circumcised but this was the first problem we had with him in that area) and the Dr. referred us to a specialist. The "Specialist" said that he saw this all the time with all these parents who are not circumcising their sons. He said that we have 2 options. Option 1: Get circumcised. Option 2: He could LASER the lesions but then they would just come back. I decided to do some research FIRST before make any kind of decision iwth my kids privates. What I found out that it was NORMAL and that they go away ON THEIR OWN. What I read talked about making sure my kid cleaned properly (no special soaps or lotions or anything - just good old water) and so I sat my son down and told him the 3 options we can do. He went with Option 3: Cleaning and taking care of those important parts. Guess what? Since then, not a single problem. Hmmm. Makes you wonder, huh?)
Here are the ingredients and what they are! (please note, I didn't have time to list what they are USED FOR. So, I will probably update this post at a later time with that info, or another post entirely)
Cetaphil Moisturizing Lotion, Fragrance Free 16
Water (Purified) - Water is good, won't argue this one
Glycerin - Fair amount of data : Glycerin (also called glycerol) is a naturally occurring alcohol compound and a component of many lipids. Glycerin may be of animal or vegetable origin. This ingredient is listed in the PETA's Caring Consumer guide as a byproduct of soap manufacture which typically uses animal fat. Organ system toxicity (non-reproductive)
Hydrogenated Polyisobutene - Not Sure, not a lot of data on it. This ingredient is a synthetic polymer used as a skin conditioning agent.
Cetearyl Alcohol - Not Sure, not a lot of data on it. Cetearyl Alcohol is a mixture of cetyl and stearyl alcohols that can come from vegetable or synthetic sources. Ecotoxicology
Ceteareth 20 - No data/information
Macadamia Ternifolia (Nut) Oil - No data/information!! At least not on the "Nut" Oil
>> I added this one since there was SOME info on it: Macadamia Integrifolia Seed Oil - Limited data. Macadamia Integrifolia Seed Oil is a fixed oil obtained from the nut of Macadamiaintegrifolia.
Dimethicone - Not a lot of info on it. Dimethicone (also called polymethylsiloxane) is a silicon-based polymer used as a lubricant and conditioning agent. Suspected to be an environmental toxin and be persistent or bioaccumulative
Tocopheryl Acetate (Vitamin E) - Fair amount of data: Tocopheryl acetate is a chemical compound that consists of acetic acid and tocopherol (vitamin E), Human skin toxicant - strong evidence, One or more animal studies show tumor formation at high doses, Suspected to be an environmental toxin and be persistent or bioaccumulative (uncertainty in environmental toxicity or persistence/bioaccumulation)
Stearoxytrimethylsilane - Limited data on this as well. Stearoxytrimethylsilane is an organo-silicon compound. From PETA's Caring Consumer: Fat from cows and sheep and from dogs and cats euthanized in animal shelters, etc. Most often refers to a fatty substance taken from the stomachs of pigs. Can be harsh, irritating. Used in cosmetics, soaps, lubricants, candles, hairspray, conditioners, deodorants, creams, chewing gum, food flavoring. Derivatives: Stearamide, Stearamine, Stearates, Stearic Hydrazide, Stearone, Stearoxytrimethylsilane, Stearoyl Lactylic Acid, Stearyl Betaine, Stearyl Imidazoline. Alternatives: Stearic acid can be found in many vegetable fats, coconut.
Stearyl Alcohol - Limited Data, Stearyl alcohol is a compound produced from stearic acid, a naturally occurring fatty acid. Human irritant - strong evidence
Panthenol - Limited Data. Panthenol is a form of vitamin B5, used as a moisturizer and lubricating compound. This ingredient is listed in the PETA's Caring Consumer guide as a substance that can be of either animal or plant origin.
Farnesol - Fair amount of data: Farnesol is a flavor and perfume ingredient found in nature and also manufactured synthetically; associated with allergies and contact dermatitis. Possible human immune system toxicant.
Benzyl Alcohol - Fair amount of data Benzyl alcohol is a naturally ocurring and synthetic ingredient used as solvent and preservative; has been associated with contact allergy. Strong evidence of human neurotoxicity. Organ system toxicity (non-reproductive)
Phenoxyethanol - Limited Data. Phenoxyethanol is a preservative used in cosmetics and personal care products. Limited evidence of skin and immune system toxicity. Classified as irritant. Classified as toxic or harmful (non reproductive).
Acrylates/C10 30 Alkyl Acrylate Crosspolymer - No Data! This ingredient is a polymer of actylic acid and related chemicals.
Sodium Hydroxide - Fair amount of Data. Sodium Hydroxide is a highly caustic and reactive inorganic base. Irritation (skin, eyes, or lungs), Data gaps, Occupational hazards. Classified as expected to be toxic or harmful
Citric Acid - Good amount of Data. Citric acid is an alpha hydroxy acid used in personal care products to adjust the acidity or promote skin peeling and re-growth in the case of anti-aging products. Citric acid is naturally found in citric fruits and juices, providing the characteristic acidic taste.
Other HIGH concerns: Neurotoxicity, Organ system toxicity (non-reproductive), Multiple, additive exposure sources, Irritation (skin, eyes, or lungs), Occupational hazards
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/product/215192/Cetaphil_Moisturizing_Lotion/
Other reviews and articles about Cetaphil:
http://www.epinions.com/review/Cetaphil_Moisturizing_Cream/content_209228893828
http://wellandgoodnyc.com/2010/07/20/cetaphil-why-the-popular-cleanser-isn%E2%80%99t-doing-your-skin-any-favors/#axzz1NT5GFVRj
Answers From Nature: http://www.answersfromnature.com/
There are 2 lotions that I really and truly love from Answers from Nature. You will note immediately that it has a hell of a lot more natural ingredients!!! No Alcohol, No Propylene Glycol and no Parabens :)
Age-Defying Body Lotion
Deionized Water - Ummm. it's water (like above) - Synonym(s): ONSEN-SUI; AQUA; DEIONIZED WATER; DISTILLED WATER; PURIFIED WATER; DIHYDROGEN OXIDE; DISTILLED WATER
MSM (Methylsulfonylmethane) - MSM is a chemical found in plants, animals, and humans. It can also be made in a laboratory. People use it as a medicine.
Alpha Lipoic Acid - Fair amount of data. Alpha-lipoic acid is an antioxidant that's in many foods, and it's made naturally in our bodies. For many years, high doses of alpha-lipoic acid supplements have been used in parts of Europe for certain types of nerve damage. Studies suggest that they might also help with type 2 diabetes.
Ascorbyl Palmitate - Limited amount of data. Ascorbyl Palmitate is a compound composed of of Ascorbic Acid (Vitamin C) and palmitic acid, a naturally occurring fatty acid.
Glyceryl Stearate - Limited Data. Glyceryl Stearate SE (self-emulsifying) is a lipid used as surfactant and emulsifying agent.
Stearic Acid - Fair amount of data. Stearic acid is a naturally occurring fatty acid. It is listed in the PETA's Caring Consumer guide as a substance of animal origin, since stearic acid is primarily derived from rendered fat of farm and domestic animals. Suspected to be an environmental toxin
Apricot Oil - Limited data. Prunus Armeniaca (Apricot) Kernel Oil is a fixed oil expressed from the kernels of varietiesof Prunus armeniaca. Fragrance Ingredient; Skin-Conditioning Agent - Occlusive
Almond Oil - Limited data. Almond oil is extracted from the seed kernels of the sweet almond plant, Prunus Amygdalus Dulcis. Fragrance Ingredient; Skin-Conditioning Agent - Occlusive
Jojoba Oil - Limited data. Jojoba oil is extracted from seeds of the desert shrub, Simmondsia chinensis, native to California, Arizona and Mexico.
Sorbitol - Fair amount of data. Sorbitol (glucitol) is a type of sugar alcohol used as a thickener and a skin conditioning agent.
Sesame Oil - Fair amount of data. Oil of the sesame (Sesamum indicum) seeds
Calendula Extract - Limited data. Extract of the calendula (Calendula officinalis) flowers.
Chamomile Extract - Limited data. Extract of the camomile (Anthemis nobilis) flowers. Penetration enhancer.
St. John’s Wort Extract - Limited data.
Algae Extract - Limited data. Algae Extract is an unspecified botanical extract of different species of algae (can vary between manufacturers).
Aloe Vera Gel - Limited data. Aloe vera gel is extracted from the succulent leaves of the aloe plant, Aloe barbadensis
Sodium Hyaluronate - Fair amount of data. Sodium hyaluronate is the sodium salt of hyaluronic acid, a naturally occurring polysaccharide found in connective tissues such as cartilage. This ingredient is listed in the PETA's Caring Consumer guide as derived from animal sources.
Ginkgo Biloba Leaf Extract - Fair amount of data.
Grape Seed Extract - Fair amount of data. Grape seed extract is obtained from the seeds of grape plant, Vitis vinifera.
Co-Enzyme Q10 - Fair amount of data. Antioxidant; Skin-Conditioning Agent - Miscellaneous; SKIN CONDITIONING
Tocopherol Acetate - see above, listed in Cetaphil as well.
Retinyl Palmitate - Fair amount of data. Retinyl palmitate is an ingredient composed of palmitic acid and retinol (Vitamin A). When exposed to UV light, retinol compounds break down and produce toxic free radicals that can damage DNA and cause gene mutations, a precursor to cancer. Recently available data from an FDA study indicate that retinyl palmitate, when applied to the skin in the presence of sunlight, may speed the development of skin tumors and lesions. FDA also raised a concern that extensive, daily skin application of vitamin A creams may build up in the woman�s body a high enough level of Vitamin A that may be toxic to the developing fetus.
Ascorbic Acid - Fair amount of data. Ascorbic acid (Vitamin C) is a naturally occurring antioxidant.
Amla - Limited data.
Grapefruit Seed Extract - Extract of the seeds of the grapefruit, Citrus grandis.
DMAE Complex - Still researching :)
Essential Oils - Not sure if this is referring to the above oils or something else. I will be contacting the manufacturer to find out.
Healing Springs Body Lotions – #2137 Kiwi & #2138 Unscented
With this being very similar to the one above, I am only going to review those not previously shown.
Deionized Water, MSM (Methylsulfonylmethane), Glyceryl Stearate, Stearic Acid, Apricot Oil, Almond Oil, Jojoba Oil, Sorbitol, Sesame Oil, Calendula Extract, Chamomile Extract, Algae Extract, Aloe Vera Gel, Sodium Hyaluronate, Ginkgo Biloba Leaf Extract, Grape Seed Extract, Tocopherol Acetate, Retinyl Palmitate, Ascorbic Acid, Amla, Grapefruit Seed Extract, Essential Oils.
Orange Flower Extract - No data. Citrus Aurantium Dulcis (Orange) Flower Extract is an extract of the flowers of the orange, Citrus aurantium dulcis.
Tea Tree Oil - Limited data. This ingredient is distilled from the leaves of Tea Tree, Melaleuca alternifolia, a shrub native to New Zealand.
Sources:
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/702620/GLYCERIN/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/702946/HYDROGENATED_POLYISOBUTENE/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/701236/CETEARYL_ALCOHOL/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/706317/STEAROXYTRIMETHYLSILANE/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/706325/STEARYL_ALCOHOL/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/704436/PANTHENOL/#
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/700697/BENZYL_ALCOHOL/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/704811/PHENOXYETHANOL/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/700138/ACRYLATES%3B%3B_C10-30_ALKYL_ACRYLATE_CROSSPOLYMER/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/706075/SODIUM_HYDROXIDE/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/701385/CITRIC_ACID/#
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/703665/MACADAMIA_INTEGRIFOLIA_%28MACADAMIA%29_NUT_OIL/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Methylsulfonylmethane
http://www.webmd.com/vitamins-supplements/ingredientmono-522-MSM%20(METHYLSULFONYLMETHANE).aspx?activeIngredientId=522&activeIngredientName=MSM%20(METHYLSULFONYLMETHANE)
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/700293/ALPHA_LIPOIC_ACID/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/700555/ASCORBYL_PALMITATE_%28VITAMIN_C_PALMITATE%29/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/702658/GLYCERYL_STEARATE_SE/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/706311/STEARIC_ACID/#
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/705357/PRUNUS_ARMENIACA_%28APRICOT%29_OIL/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/707096/PRUNUS_AMYGDALUS_DULCIS_%28SWEET_ALMOND%29_OIL/
http://www.webmd.com/vitamins-and-supplements/lifestyle-guide-11/supplement-guide-alpha-lipoic-acid
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/705966/SIMMONDSIA_CHINENSIS_%28JOJOBA%29_SEED_OIL/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/706239/SORBITOL/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/705892/SESAMUM_INDICUM_%28SESAME%29_SEED_OIL/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/700990/CALENDULA_OFFICINALIS_%28POT_MARIGOLD%29_FLOWER_EXTRACT/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/700448/ANTHEMIS_NOBILIS_%28CHAMOMILE%29_FLOWER_EXTRACT/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/703099/HYPERICUM_PERFORATUM_%28ST._JOHN%27S_WORT%29_FLOWER_EXTRACT/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/700229/ALGAE_EXTRACT/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/700269/ALOE_BARBADENSIS_%28ALOE_VERA%29_GEL/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/706071/SODIUM_HYALURONATE/#
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/719187/GINKGO_BILOBA/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/707093/VITIS_VINIFERA_%28GRAPE%29_SEED_EXTRACT/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/706762/UBIQUINONE/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/705545/RETINYL_PALMITATE_%28VITAMIN_A_PALMITATE%29/#
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/700544/ASCORBIC_ACID_%28VITAMIN_C%29/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/700352/AMLA/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/701433/CITRUS_GRANDIS_%28GRAPEFRUIT%29_SEED_EXTRACT/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/704317/CITRUS_AURANTIUM_DULCIS_%28ORANGE%29_FLOWER_EXTRACT/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/703792/MELALEUCA_ALTERNIFOLIA_%28TEA_TREE%29_LEAF_OIL/
Personally, I really perfer to use products that are natural and/or organic when possible. I also want to make sure I am using products that actually work! Who wants to waste money on something that just coats your skin or stripe your hair with crap? (side note: I have been using aromatherapy oils for YEARS and have several books on them and the incredible things that they alone can do is amazing) Of course, some people will think that they are old wives tales or crap or whatever. I use what I know works. Period. I research ingredients, see what other people have said and recommend/not recommend. Every person is different and therefore will react differently. Me, I have very sensitive skin and (now) the Dr. says Eczema (ha, which only just happened with our move to MD - Oh and the Dr. said there is Lime in the water here, so blah) and to be honest, I might get a 2nd opinion on that. (another side note: I can be very lazy, which translates into not actually using anything since I have to run out the door to work - bad me. When I DO use my lotion though - just after my shower, I don't have any problems!!).
So, in other words, I really don't like what I am reading about Cetaphil. My Dr. recommended it because it's the closest thing to steroids that isn't steroids, that is good for Eczema. He would not even hear of me using anything else. He refused to listen, which always makes me cautious. It's not that hard to say "Well, I don't know, why don't you bring it on your next appointment and let me look at it." - OR - ask for the website/info about it. I know Dr's are busy, but seriously, we are ALL busy.
(Side STORY about Dr's in my town: A couple years when we first moved here, my kid got a UTI (he's not circumcised but this was the first problem we had with him in that area) and the Dr. referred us to a specialist. The "Specialist" said that he saw this all the time with all these parents who are not circumcising their sons. He said that we have 2 options. Option 1: Get circumcised. Option 2: He could LASER the lesions but then they would just come back. I decided to do some research FIRST before make any kind of decision iwth my kids privates. What I found out that it was NORMAL and that they go away ON THEIR OWN. What I read talked about making sure my kid cleaned properly (no special soaps or lotions or anything - just good old water) and so I sat my son down and told him the 3 options we can do. He went with Option 3: Cleaning and taking care of those important parts. Guess what? Since then, not a single problem. Hmmm. Makes you wonder, huh?)
Here are the ingredients and what they are! (please note, I didn't have time to list what they are USED FOR. So, I will probably update this post at a later time with that info, or another post entirely)
Cetaphil Moisturizing Lotion, Fragrance Free 16
Water (Purified) - Water is good, won't argue this one
Glycerin - Fair amount of data : Glycerin (also called glycerol) is a naturally occurring alcohol compound and a component of many lipids. Glycerin may be of animal or vegetable origin. This ingredient is listed in the PETA's Caring Consumer guide as a byproduct of soap manufacture which typically uses animal fat. Organ system toxicity (non-reproductive)
Hydrogenated Polyisobutene - Not Sure, not a lot of data on it. This ingredient is a synthetic polymer used as a skin conditioning agent.
Cetearyl Alcohol - Not Sure, not a lot of data on it. Cetearyl Alcohol is a mixture of cetyl and stearyl alcohols that can come from vegetable or synthetic sources. Ecotoxicology
Ceteareth 20 - No data/information
Macadamia Ternifolia (Nut) Oil - No data/information!! At least not on the "Nut" Oil
>> I added this one since there was SOME info on it: Macadamia Integrifolia Seed Oil - Limited data. Macadamia Integrifolia Seed Oil is a fixed oil obtained from the nut of Macadamiaintegrifolia.
Dimethicone - Not a lot of info on it. Dimethicone (also called polymethylsiloxane) is a silicon-based polymer used as a lubricant and conditioning agent. Suspected to be an environmental toxin and be persistent or bioaccumulative
Tocopheryl Acetate (Vitamin E) - Fair amount of data: Tocopheryl acetate is a chemical compound that consists of acetic acid and tocopherol (vitamin E), Human skin toxicant - strong evidence, One or more animal studies show tumor formation at high doses, Suspected to be an environmental toxin and be persistent or bioaccumulative (uncertainty in environmental toxicity or persistence/bioaccumulation)
Stearoxytrimethylsilane - Limited data on this as well. Stearoxytrimethylsilane is an organo-silicon compound. From PETA's Caring Consumer: Fat from cows and sheep and from dogs and cats euthanized in animal shelters, etc. Most often refers to a fatty substance taken from the stomachs of pigs. Can be harsh, irritating. Used in cosmetics, soaps, lubricants, candles, hairspray, conditioners, deodorants, creams, chewing gum, food flavoring. Derivatives: Stearamide, Stearamine, Stearates, Stearic Hydrazide, Stearone, Stearoxytrimethylsilane, Stearoyl Lactylic Acid, Stearyl Betaine, Stearyl Imidazoline. Alternatives: Stearic acid can be found in many vegetable fats, coconut.
Stearyl Alcohol - Limited Data, Stearyl alcohol is a compound produced from stearic acid, a naturally occurring fatty acid. Human irritant - strong evidence
Panthenol - Limited Data. Panthenol is a form of vitamin B5, used as a moisturizer and lubricating compound. This ingredient is listed in the PETA's Caring Consumer guide as a substance that can be of either animal or plant origin.
Farnesol - Fair amount of data: Farnesol is a flavor and perfume ingredient found in nature and also manufactured synthetically; associated with allergies and contact dermatitis. Possible human immune system toxicant.
Benzyl Alcohol - Fair amount of data Benzyl alcohol is a naturally ocurring and synthetic ingredient used as solvent and preservative; has been associated with contact allergy. Strong evidence of human neurotoxicity. Organ system toxicity (non-reproductive)
Phenoxyethanol - Limited Data. Phenoxyethanol is a preservative used in cosmetics and personal care products. Limited evidence of skin and immune system toxicity. Classified as irritant. Classified as toxic or harmful (non reproductive).
Acrylates/C10 30 Alkyl Acrylate Crosspolymer - No Data! This ingredient is a polymer of actylic acid and related chemicals.
Sodium Hydroxide - Fair amount of Data. Sodium Hydroxide is a highly caustic and reactive inorganic base. Irritation (skin, eyes, or lungs), Data gaps, Occupational hazards. Classified as expected to be toxic or harmful
Citric Acid - Good amount of Data. Citric acid is an alpha hydroxy acid used in personal care products to adjust the acidity or promote skin peeling and re-growth in the case of anti-aging products. Citric acid is naturally found in citric fruits and juices, providing the characteristic acidic taste.
Other HIGH concerns: Neurotoxicity, Organ system toxicity (non-reproductive), Multiple, additive exposure sources, Irritation (skin, eyes, or lungs), Occupational hazards
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/product/215192/Cetaphil_Moisturizing_Lotion/
Other reviews and articles about Cetaphil:
http://www.epinions.com/review/Cetaphil_Moisturizing_Cream/content_209228893828
http://wellandgoodnyc.com/2010/07/20/cetaphil-why-the-popular-cleanser-isn%E2%80%99t-doing-your-skin-any-favors/#axzz1NT5GFVRj
Answers From Nature: http://www.answersfromnature.com/
There are 2 lotions that I really and truly love from Answers from Nature. You will note immediately that it has a hell of a lot more natural ingredients!!! No Alcohol, No Propylene Glycol and no Parabens :)
Age-Defying Body Lotion
Deionized Water - Ummm. it's water (like above) - Synonym(s): ONSEN-SUI; AQUA; DEIONIZED WATER; DISTILLED WATER; PURIFIED WATER; DIHYDROGEN OXIDE; DISTILLED WATER
MSM (Methylsulfonylmethane) - MSM is a chemical found in plants, animals, and humans. It can also be made in a laboratory. People use it as a medicine.
Alpha Lipoic Acid - Fair amount of data. Alpha-lipoic acid is an antioxidant that's in many foods, and it's made naturally in our bodies. For many years, high doses of alpha-lipoic acid supplements have been used in parts of Europe for certain types of nerve damage. Studies suggest that they might also help with type 2 diabetes.
Ascorbyl Palmitate - Limited amount of data. Ascorbyl Palmitate is a compound composed of of Ascorbic Acid (Vitamin C) and palmitic acid, a naturally occurring fatty acid.
Glyceryl Stearate - Limited Data. Glyceryl Stearate SE (self-emulsifying) is a lipid used as surfactant and emulsifying agent.
Stearic Acid - Fair amount of data. Stearic acid is a naturally occurring fatty acid. It is listed in the PETA's Caring Consumer guide as a substance of animal origin, since stearic acid is primarily derived from rendered fat of farm and domestic animals. Suspected to be an environmental toxin
Apricot Oil - Limited data. Prunus Armeniaca (Apricot) Kernel Oil is a fixed oil expressed from the kernels of varietiesof Prunus armeniaca. Fragrance Ingredient; Skin-Conditioning Agent - Occlusive
Almond Oil - Limited data. Almond oil is extracted from the seed kernels of the sweet almond plant, Prunus Amygdalus Dulcis. Fragrance Ingredient; Skin-Conditioning Agent - Occlusive
Jojoba Oil - Limited data. Jojoba oil is extracted from seeds of the desert shrub, Simmondsia chinensis, native to California, Arizona and Mexico.
Sorbitol - Fair amount of data. Sorbitol (glucitol) is a type of sugar alcohol used as a thickener and a skin conditioning agent.
Sesame Oil - Fair amount of data. Oil of the sesame (Sesamum indicum) seeds
Calendula Extract - Limited data. Extract of the calendula (Calendula officinalis) flowers.
Chamomile Extract - Limited data. Extract of the camomile (Anthemis nobilis) flowers. Penetration enhancer.
St. John’s Wort Extract - Limited data.
Algae Extract - Limited data. Algae Extract is an unspecified botanical extract of different species of algae (can vary between manufacturers).
Aloe Vera Gel - Limited data. Aloe vera gel is extracted from the succulent leaves of the aloe plant, Aloe barbadensis
Sodium Hyaluronate - Fair amount of data. Sodium hyaluronate is the sodium salt of hyaluronic acid, a naturally occurring polysaccharide found in connective tissues such as cartilage. This ingredient is listed in the PETA's Caring Consumer guide as derived from animal sources.
Ginkgo Biloba Leaf Extract - Fair amount of data.
Grape Seed Extract - Fair amount of data. Grape seed extract is obtained from the seeds of grape plant, Vitis vinifera.
Co-Enzyme Q10 - Fair amount of data. Antioxidant; Skin-Conditioning Agent - Miscellaneous; SKIN CONDITIONING
Tocopherol Acetate - see above, listed in Cetaphil as well.
Retinyl Palmitate - Fair amount of data. Retinyl palmitate is an ingredient composed of palmitic acid and retinol (Vitamin A). When exposed to UV light, retinol compounds break down and produce toxic free radicals that can damage DNA and cause gene mutations, a precursor to cancer. Recently available data from an FDA study indicate that retinyl palmitate, when applied to the skin in the presence of sunlight, may speed the development of skin tumors and lesions. FDA also raised a concern that extensive, daily skin application of vitamin A creams may build up in the woman�s body a high enough level of Vitamin A that may be toxic to the developing fetus.
Ascorbic Acid - Fair amount of data. Ascorbic acid (Vitamin C) is a naturally occurring antioxidant.
Amla - Limited data.
Grapefruit Seed Extract - Extract of the seeds of the grapefruit, Citrus grandis.
DMAE Complex - Still researching :)
Essential Oils - Not sure if this is referring to the above oils or something else. I will be contacting the manufacturer to find out.
Healing Springs Body Lotions – #2137 Kiwi & #2138 Unscented
With this being very similar to the one above, I am only going to review those not previously shown.
Deionized Water, MSM (Methylsulfonylmethane), Glyceryl Stearate, Stearic Acid, Apricot Oil, Almond Oil, Jojoba Oil, Sorbitol, Sesame Oil, Calendula Extract, Chamomile Extract, Algae Extract, Aloe Vera Gel, Sodium Hyaluronate, Ginkgo Biloba Leaf Extract, Grape Seed Extract, Tocopherol Acetate, Retinyl Palmitate, Ascorbic Acid, Amla, Grapefruit Seed Extract, Essential Oils.
Orange Flower Extract - No data. Citrus Aurantium Dulcis (Orange) Flower Extract is an extract of the flowers of the orange, Citrus aurantium dulcis.
Tea Tree Oil - Limited data. This ingredient is distilled from the leaves of Tea Tree, Melaleuca alternifolia, a shrub native to New Zealand.
Sources:
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/702620/GLYCERIN/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/702946/HYDROGENATED_POLYISOBUTENE/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/701236/CETEARYL_ALCOHOL/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/706317/STEAROXYTRIMETHYLSILANE/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/706325/STEARYL_ALCOHOL/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/704436/PANTHENOL/#
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/700697/BENZYL_ALCOHOL/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/704811/PHENOXYETHANOL/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/700138/ACRYLATES%3B%3B_C10-30_ALKYL_ACRYLATE_CROSSPOLYMER/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/706075/SODIUM_HYDROXIDE/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/701385/CITRIC_ACID/#
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/703665/MACADAMIA_INTEGRIFOLIA_%28MACADAMIA%29_NUT_OIL/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Methylsulfonylmethane
http://www.webmd.com/vitamins-supplements/ingredientmono-522-MSM%20(METHYLSULFONYLMETHANE).aspx?activeIngredientId=522&activeIngredientName=MSM%20(METHYLSULFONYLMETHANE)
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/700293/ALPHA_LIPOIC_ACID/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/700555/ASCORBYL_PALMITATE_%28VITAMIN_C_PALMITATE%29/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/702658/GLYCERYL_STEARATE_SE/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/706311/STEARIC_ACID/#
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/705357/PRUNUS_ARMENIACA_%28APRICOT%29_OIL/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/707096/PRUNUS_AMYGDALUS_DULCIS_%28SWEET_ALMOND%29_OIL/
http://www.webmd.com/vitamins-and-supplements/lifestyle-guide-11/supplement-guide-alpha-lipoic-acid
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/705966/SIMMONDSIA_CHINENSIS_%28JOJOBA%29_SEED_OIL/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/706239/SORBITOL/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/705892/SESAMUM_INDICUM_%28SESAME%29_SEED_OIL/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/700990/CALENDULA_OFFICINALIS_%28POT_MARIGOLD%29_FLOWER_EXTRACT/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/700448/ANTHEMIS_NOBILIS_%28CHAMOMILE%29_FLOWER_EXTRACT/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/703099/HYPERICUM_PERFORATUM_%28ST._JOHN%27S_WORT%29_FLOWER_EXTRACT/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/700229/ALGAE_EXTRACT/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/700269/ALOE_BARBADENSIS_%28ALOE_VERA%29_GEL/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/706071/SODIUM_HYALURONATE/#
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/719187/GINKGO_BILOBA/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/707093/VITIS_VINIFERA_%28GRAPE%29_SEED_EXTRACT/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/706762/UBIQUINONE/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/705545/RETINYL_PALMITATE_%28VITAMIN_A_PALMITATE%29/#
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/700544/ASCORBIC_ACID_%28VITAMIN_C%29/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/700352/AMLA/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/701433/CITRUS_GRANDIS_%28GRAPEFRUIT%29_SEED_EXTRACT/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/704317/CITRUS_AURANTIUM_DULCIS_%28ORANGE%29_FLOWER_EXTRACT/
http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ingredient/703792/MELALEUCA_ALTERNIFOLIA_%28TEA_TREE%29_LEAF_OIL/
Labels:
Answers From Nature,
Cetaphil,
Dry Skin,
Eczema,
Lotion
5.05.2011
Magickal Blessings Part 1
So this weekend I will be heading over to my bff's house and help her with some re-arranging and then some magick.
I need to find a good house cleansing and then house blessing for her. Since her place is HUGE, this will be exhausting, but well worth it.
We're out of Mercury Retrograde, which is good at least. I should see where the planets are aligned for this weekend and try to pull in some of those energies. Oh and look at her chart and see what might strengthen her as well.
Since she has a dog, I want to make sure it's pet friendly as well.
I am tempted to get a spray bottle, make and bless a magickal water and use that as part of it. You know, bless the water, throw in some stones and herbs and then cracking.
Sage, Sweet Grass, Stones, Herbs, Incence, Chants and Blessings. I need to get my research pants on!
I need to find a good house cleansing and then house blessing for her. Since her place is HUGE, this will be exhausting, but well worth it.
We're out of Mercury Retrograde, which is good at least. I should see where the planets are aligned for this weekend and try to pull in some of those energies. Oh and look at her chart and see what might strengthen her as well.
Since she has a dog, I want to make sure it's pet friendly as well.
I am tempted to get a spray bottle, make and bless a magickal water and use that as part of it. You know, bless the water, throw in some stones and herbs and then cracking.
Sage, Sweet Grass, Stones, Herbs, Incence, Chants and Blessings. I need to get my research pants on!
Labels:
House Blessing,
House Cleansing,
Magick,
Magickal Blessings
1.24.2011
What is an Alpha Female??
Ok, so I have been called an "Alpha Female" and it may sounds like a good thing, too much of any good thing can be bad (as in cookies and maybe chocolate - I reserve judgement on the chocolate though)
Something you have to understand about me - I am a woman in a male dominated field. Just like IT, I am located on a base where the authority is mostly male. Not always bad, just that some men suck where I wish others would.
Anyways, I read something like this:
"The change in women’s social roles has led to the development of the concept of the alpha female, but currently there is no way to measure the construct. The present study discusses the development of a 14-item measure of an alpha female personality that is consistent with current definitions and examines the measure with respect to similar constructs (e.g., self-esteem, emotional intelligence, leadership, and sex-role). The three scales of the Alpha Female Inventory (leadership, strength, and low introversion) were positively related to self-esteem, emotional intelligence, the Student Leadership Profile Inventory, and masculine traits as measured by Bem’s Sex-Role Inventory. The Alpha Female Inventory can be used to identify women who embody alpha leadership qualities and to aid in our overall understanding of women as leaders."
And think - WTF - women have ALWAYS been leaders - otherwise there would be no children and thus no human population. Because when you get right down to it, men want US - WOMEN, they want to get into our pants (lol, love that phrase...) and there is no real subsitute for sex with us. So, yeah we have had to fight for getting laws made to make us "equal" in they eyes because let's face it, life for a woman has been a bitch for way too long. However, we have power. We just didn't always realize it until someone other woman pointed it out to us. Or told us how to use it. I am not saying sex is the ONLY power we have, but it is a good one. One bat of an eyelash, shake of a hip and heavens forbid a bit of cleavage and men stop - just stop.
And if you think about it, there have always been alpha females, just like there has always been alpha males. We lead the pack, we protect and care for the pack. We make sure the pack is going to survive. Wow, that sounds just like a fucking MOM. Hmmm, maybe all moms are really Alpha females in their own ways.
Society, now Society is just getting on the band wagon that there is a "new" Alpha female. One just like the Alpha male where we are confident, smart, sexy and always get our ways. Hmmm, sounds like most women I know.
"In the past, growing girls and women were taught to submerge these characteristics. Sometimes they were shamed or punished or even physically harmed when they used them. Today, those characteristics are applauded and rewarded, especially in the world of business and profession. Today you can be proud of them."
Granted, the last 1900 years or so have been bad, harsh and damn straight nasty for many/most women. However, the above just proves that there has always been Alpha's and that at the time(s) society dictated what was and was not acceptable. Fucking media.
"About 40% of the human female and male population is alpha. At their best, these characteristics allow the alpha female to fiercely protect and provide for herself and her family and to be a leader in the workplace and in her community."
So in other words, just a hair shy less than half the woman kick ass on a regular basis. I don't necessarily agree that Alpha females run in packs, as some have suggested. I think we do what we need to do period. So we're smart and have our girlfriends back us up when we need. Its not like we have our girlfriends every second of the day, to help on every single thing. We stand alone for most of it.
Also, we those to seem to think us Alpha females feel ourselves as perfect know it alls who deserves everything. Well guess what, bullshit. We're alpha for usually a couple reasons. Some are lucky enough to have parents that raised us to kick ass. Others, like me, were brought to kick ass but life trying to suck the joy right out of us and we said fuck you get your own life. If you really think that the prima donna's in HS were all alpha female, guess again. Granted they might have shown the fake little world of HS this type of attitude, but that does mean those Prima's were feeling it. So please don't confuse a down right bitch with an Alpha female.
Others try to say its all our hormones...which I can see a little bit. After all, its usually after we have a kid that we get seriously protective of our family. However, I really don't see how that can be ALL of it. An Alpha is a woman with a will.
Society and Media have really tried to force whatever the current trend is on a woman, and I'm sorry but almost all the women I know are really fucking busy to sit down and view what stupid shit is in front of them. If we, as a whole, took the time and then actually DID something about it, we would change the image we want to be mirrored...and not have this stupid shit mirrored already at us.
I am guilty of this. I don't normally have the time to really research, look into, talk about and figure out all the damn answers when I want to. I sorta go with my gut (which I do trust) and try to research when I have time. I took time to research organic food, and still do so on a regular basis because it's really important to me. When some stupid shit happens in my life, I go and do research and try to figure out whats best...but I also know that is one of MY strengths and not all Alpha's are strong in the same ways...
So, I know I am an Alpha because, I think for me personally, I don't let people change me. I believe in me. I trust myself. I love myself. I am not perfect. I am not some drop dead beautiful CEO who rules the roost. I am a mother, a sister, a best friend and someone who give fucking cares.
So deal with it :)
Sources:
http://alphadominance.com/?p=647
http://www.articleclick.com/Article/Alpha-Female-What-is-her-Role-/1061379
http://www.winningatlovebook.com/alpha-female-characteristics.htm
http://jlo.sagepub.com/content/17/3/309.short
Something you have to understand about me - I am a woman in a male dominated field. Just like IT, I am located on a base where the authority is mostly male. Not always bad, just that some men suck where I wish others would.
Anyways, I read something like this:
"The change in women’s social roles has led to the development of the concept of the alpha female, but currently there is no way to measure the construct. The present study discusses the development of a 14-item measure of an alpha female personality that is consistent with current definitions and examines the measure with respect to similar constructs (e.g., self-esteem, emotional intelligence, leadership, and sex-role). The three scales of the Alpha Female Inventory (leadership, strength, and low introversion) were positively related to self-esteem, emotional intelligence, the Student Leadership Profile Inventory, and masculine traits as measured by Bem’s Sex-Role Inventory. The Alpha Female Inventory can be used to identify women who embody alpha leadership qualities and to aid in our overall understanding of women as leaders."
And think - WTF - women have ALWAYS been leaders - otherwise there would be no children and thus no human population. Because when you get right down to it, men want US - WOMEN, they want to get into our pants (lol, love that phrase...) and there is no real subsitute for sex with us. So, yeah we have had to fight for getting laws made to make us "equal" in they eyes because let's face it, life for a woman has been a bitch for way too long. However, we have power. We just didn't always realize it until someone other woman pointed it out to us. Or told us how to use it. I am not saying sex is the ONLY power we have, but it is a good one. One bat of an eyelash, shake of a hip and heavens forbid a bit of cleavage and men stop - just stop.
And if you think about it, there have always been alpha females, just like there has always been alpha males. We lead the pack, we protect and care for the pack. We make sure the pack is going to survive. Wow, that sounds just like a fucking MOM. Hmmm, maybe all moms are really Alpha females in their own ways.
Society, now Society is just getting on the band wagon that there is a "new" Alpha female. One just like the Alpha male where we are confident, smart, sexy and always get our ways. Hmmm, sounds like most women I know.
"In the past, growing girls and women were taught to submerge these characteristics. Sometimes they were shamed or punished or even physically harmed when they used them. Today, those characteristics are applauded and rewarded, especially in the world of business and profession. Today you can be proud of them."
Granted, the last 1900 years or so have been bad, harsh and damn straight nasty for many/most women. However, the above just proves that there has always been Alpha's and that at the time(s) society dictated what was and was not acceptable. Fucking media.
"About 40% of the human female and male population is alpha. At their best, these characteristics allow the alpha female to fiercely protect and provide for herself and her family and to be a leader in the workplace and in her community."
So in other words, just a hair shy less than half the woman kick ass on a regular basis. I don't necessarily agree that Alpha females run in packs, as some have suggested. I think we do what we need to do period. So we're smart and have our girlfriends back us up when we need. Its not like we have our girlfriends every second of the day, to help on every single thing. We stand alone for most of it.
Also, we those to seem to think us Alpha females feel ourselves as perfect know it alls who deserves everything. Well guess what, bullshit. We're alpha for usually a couple reasons. Some are lucky enough to have parents that raised us to kick ass. Others, like me, were brought to kick ass but life trying to suck the joy right out of us and we said fuck you get your own life. If you really think that the prima donna's in HS were all alpha female, guess again. Granted they might have shown the fake little world of HS this type of attitude, but that does mean those Prima's were feeling it. So please don't confuse a down right bitch with an Alpha female.
Others try to say its all our hormones...which I can see a little bit. After all, its usually after we have a kid that we get seriously protective of our family. However, I really don't see how that can be ALL of it. An Alpha is a woman with a will.
Society and Media have really tried to force whatever the current trend is on a woman, and I'm sorry but almost all the women I know are really fucking busy to sit down and view what stupid shit is in front of them. If we, as a whole, took the time and then actually DID something about it, we would change the image we want to be mirrored...and not have this stupid shit mirrored already at us.
I am guilty of this. I don't normally have the time to really research, look into, talk about and figure out all the damn answers when I want to. I sorta go with my gut (which I do trust) and try to research when I have time. I took time to research organic food, and still do so on a regular basis because it's really important to me. When some stupid shit happens in my life, I go and do research and try to figure out whats best...but I also know that is one of MY strengths and not all Alpha's are strong in the same ways...
So, I know I am an Alpha because, I think for me personally, I don't let people change me. I believe in me. I trust myself. I love myself. I am not perfect. I am not some drop dead beautiful CEO who rules the roost. I am a mother, a sister, a best friend and someone who give fucking cares.
So deal with it :)
Sources:
http://alphadominance.com/?p=647
http://www.articleclick.com/Article/Alpha-Female-What-is-her-Role-/1061379
http://www.winningatlovebook.com/alpha-female-characteristics.htm
http://jlo.sagepub.com/content/17/3/309.short
1.07.2011
Passive Aggressive
A week or so ago I was having an argument with the (now Ex-)hubby and I called him Passive Aggressive. He had not heard of that before and didn't really believe me that it was real or that it made sense, since it is an Oxymoronic term (like bittersweet). So, I decided to do a blog on the term and learn more about it myself, sharing of course :)
Here is what I found thus far, btw, feel free to contribute or comment!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Passive%E2%80%93aggressive_behavior
Passive–aggressive behavior, a personality trait, is passive, sometimes obstructionist resistance to following through with expectations in interpersonal or occupational situations. It is a personality trait marked by a pervasive pattern of negative attitudes and passive, usually disavowed resistance in interpersonal or occupational situations.
It can manifest itself as learned helplessness, procrastination, stubbornness, resentment, sullenness, or deliberate/repeated failure to accomplish requested tasks for which one is (often explicitly) responsible
Ambiguity or speaking cryptically: a means of engendering a feeling of insecurity in others
Chronically being late and forgetting things: another way to exert control or to punish.
Fear of competition
Fear of dependency
Fear of intimacy as a means to act out anger: The passive-aggressive often cannot trust. Because of this, they guard themselves against becoming intimately attached to someone.
Making chaotic situations
Making excuses for non-performance in work teams
Obstructionism
Procrastination
Sulking
Victimization response: instead of recognizing one's own weaknesses, tendency to blame others for own failures.
A passive-aggressive person may not have all of these behaviors, and may have other[clarification needed] non-passive-aggressive traits.
Passive-aggressive personality disorder was listed as an Axis II personality disorder in the DSM-III-R, but was moved in the DSM-IV to Appendix B ("Criteria Sets and Axes Provided for Further Study") because of controversy and the need for further research on how to also categorize the behaviors in a future edition. As an alternative, the diagnosis personality disorder not otherwise specified may be used instead.
The DSM-IV Appendix B definition is as follows:[2]
A pervasive pattern of negativistic attitudes and passive resistance to demands for adequate performance, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicted by four (or more) of the following:
passively resists fulfilling routine social and occupational tasks
complains of being misunderstood and unappreciated by others
is sullen and argumentative
unreasonably criticizes and scorns authority
expresses envy and resentment toward those apparently more fortunate
voices exaggerated and persistent complaints of personal misfortune
alternates between hostile defiance and contrition
Does not occur exclusively during major depressive episodes and is not better accounted for by dysthymic disorder.
Theodore Millon identified four subtypes of negativist.[3][4] Any individual negativist may exhibit none or one of the following:
circuitous negativist – including dependent features
abrasive negativist – including sadistic features
discontented negativist – including depressive features
vacillating negativist – including borderline features
Causes:
Passive-aggressive disorder may stem from a specific childhood stimulus[5] (e.g., alcohol/drug addicted parents) in an environment where it was not safe to express frustration or anger. Families in which the honest expression of feelings is forbidden tend to teach children to repress and deny their feelings and to use other channels to express their frustration.
Children who sugarcoat their hostility may fail to ever grow beyond such behavior. Never developing better coping strategies or skills for self-expression, they can become adults who, beneath a seductive veneer, harbor vindictive intent.[6] Martin Kantor suggests three areas that contribute to passive-aggressive anger in individuals: conflicts about dependency, control, and competition.
Treatment:
Kantor suggests a treatment approach using psychodynamic, supportive, cognitive, behavioral and interpersonal therapeutic methods. These methods apply to both the passive aggressive person and their target victim.
See also
Counterproductive work behavior
Gossip
Malicious compliance
Mind games
Passivity
Psychological manipulation
Relational aggression
Social undermining
Malicious compliance
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Malicious_compliance
Malicious compliance is the behavior of a person who intentionally inflicts harm by strictly following the orders of management or following legal compulsions, knowing that compliance with the orders will cause a loss of some form resulting in damage to the manager's business or reputation, or a loss to an employee or subordinate. In effect, it is a form of sabotage used to harm leadership or used by leadership to harm subordinates.[1]
Work-to-rule is the expression of malicious compliance as an industrial action, in which rules are deliberately followed to the letter in an attempt to reduce employee productivity.
Mind games
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mind_games
The term mind games refers to passive aggressive behavior used specifically to demoralize or empower the thinking subject, often making the aggressor look superior.[citation needed]
The psychological field of transactional analysis, and in particular the Karpman drama triangle, describe and examine mind games from a social and psychological perspective. Broadly, the term can be used for any strategy or tactic where covert mental manipulation or creation of coercive pressure of another person is a goal.[citation needed]
Psychological manipulation
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychological_manipulation
Psychological manipulation is a type of social influence that aims to change the perception or behavior of others through underhanded, deceptive, or even abusive tactics.[1] By advancing the interests of the manipulator, often at the other's expense, such methods could be considered exploitative, abusive, devious, and deceptive.
Social influence is not necessarily negative. For example, doctors can try to persuade patients to change unhealthy habits. Social influence is generally perceived to be harmless when it respects the right of the influenced to accept or reject it, and is not unduly coercive. Depending on the context and motivations, social influence may constitute underhanded manipulation.
Contents [hide]
1 Requirements for successful manipulation
2 How manipulators control their victims
2.1 According to Braiker
2.2 According to Simon
3 Vulnerabilities exploited by manipulators
4 Motivations of manipulators
5 Psychological conditions of manipulators
6 Basic manipulative strategy of a psychopath
6.1 1. Assessment phase
6.2 2. Manipulation phase
6.3 3. Abandonment phase
[edit] Requirements for successful manipulation
According to Simon, successful psychological manipulation primarily involves:
manipulator concealing aggressive intentions and behaviors.
manipulator knowing the psychological vulnerabilities of the victim to determine what tactics are likely to be the most effective.
manipulator having a sufficient level of ruthlessness to have no qualms about causing harm to the victim if necessary.
Consequently the manipulation is likely to be covert (relational aggressive or passive aggressive).[2]
[edit] How manipulators control their victims[edit]
According to BraikerBraiker[1] identified the following basic ways that manipulators control their victims:
positive reinforcement - includes praise, superficial charm, superficial sympathy (crocodile tears), excessive apologizing; money, approval, gifts; attention, facial expressions such as a forced laugh or smile; public recognition.
negative reinforcement - includes nagging, yelling, the silent treatment, intimidation, threats, swearing, emotional blackmail, the guilt trap, sulking, crying, and playing the victim.
intermittent or partial reinforcement - Partial or intermittent negative reinforcement can create an effective climate of fear and doubt, for example in terrorist attacks. Partial or intermittent positive reinforcement can encourage the victim to persist - for example in most forms of gambling, the gambler is likely to win now and again but still lose money overall.
punishment
traumatic one-trial learning - using verbal abuse, explosive anger, or other intimidating behavior to establish dominance or superiority; even one incident of such behavior can condition or train victims to avoid upsetting, confronting or contradicting the manipulator.
[edit] According to Simon
Simon[2] identified the following manipulative techniques:
Lying: It is hard to tell if somebody is lying at the time they do it although often the truth may be apparent later when it is too late. One way to minimize the chances of being lied to is to understand that some personality types (particularly psychopaths) are experts at the art of lying and cheating, doing it frequently, and often in subtle ways.
Lying by omission: This is a very subtle form of lying by withholding a significant amount of the truth. This technique is also used in propaganda.
Denial: Manipulator refuses to admit that he or she has done something wrong.
Rationalization: An excuse made by the manipulator for inappropriate behavior. Rationalization is closely related to spin.
Minimization: This is a type of denial coupled with rationalization. The manipulator asserts that his or her behavior is not as harmful or irresponsible as someone else was suggesting, for example saying that a taunt or insult was only a joke.
Selective inattention or selective attention: Manipulator refuses to pay attention to anything that may distract from his or her agenda, saying things like "I don't want to hear it".
Diversion: Manipulator not giving a straight answer to a straight question and instead being diversionary, steering the conversation onto another topic.
Evasion: Similar to diversion but giving irrelevant, rambling, vague responses, weasel words.
Covert intimidation: Manipulator throwing the victim onto the defensive by using veiled (subtle, indirect or implied) threats.
Guilt tripping: A special kind of intimidation tactic. A manipulator suggests to the conscientious victim that he or she does not care enough, is too selfish or has it easy. This usually results in the victim feeling bad, keeping them in a self-doubting, anxious and submissive position.
Shaming: Manipulator uses sarcasm and put-downs to increase fear and self-doubt in the victim. Manipulators use this tactic to make others feel unworthy and therefore defer to them. Shaming tactics can be very subtle such as a fierce look or glance, unpleasant tone of voice, rhetorical comments, subtle sarcasm. Manipulators can make one feel ashamed for even daring to challenge them. It is an effective way to foster a sense of inadequacy in the victim.
Playing the victim role ("poor me"): Manipulator portrays him- or herself as a victim of circumstance or of someone else's behavior in order to gain pity, sympathy or evoke compassion and thereby get something from another. Caring and conscientious people cannot stand to see anyone suffering and the manipulator often finds it easy to play on sympathy to get cooperation.
Vilifying the victim: More than any other, this tactic is a powerful means of putting the victim on the defensive while simultaneously masking the aggressive intent of the manipulator.
Playing the servant role: Cloaking a self-serving agenda in guise of a service to a more noble cause, for example saying he is acting in a certain way for "obedience" and "service" to God or a similar authority figure.
Seduction: Manipulator uses charm, praise, flattery or overtly supporting others in order to get them to lower their defenses and give their trust and loyalty to him or her.
Projecting the blame (blaming others): Manipulator scapegoats in often subtle, hard to detect ways.
Feigning innocence: Manipulator tries to suggest that any harm done was unintentional or did not do something that they were accused of. Manipulator may put on a look of surprise or indignation. This tactic makes the victim question his or her own judgment and possibly his own sanity.
Feigning confusion: Manipulator tries to play dumb by pretending he or she does not know what you are talking about or is confused about an important issue brought to his attention.
Brandishing anger: Manipulator uses anger to brandish sufficient emotional intensity and rage to shock the victim into submission. The manipulator is not actually angry, he or she just puts on an act. He just wants what he wants and gets "angry" when denied.
[edit] Vulnerabilities exploited by manipulators
According to Braiker[1], manipulators exploit the following vulnerabilities (buttons) that may exist in victims:
the "disease to please"
addiction to earning the approval and acceptance of others
Emotophobia (fear of negative emotion)
lack of assertiveness and ability to say no
blurry sense of identity (with soft personal boundaries)
low self-reliance
external locus of control
According to Simon[2], manipulators exploit the following vulnerabilities that may exist in victims:
naïveté - victim finds it too hard to accept the idea that some people are cunning, devious and ruthless or is "in denial" if he is being victimized
over-conscientiousness - victim is too willing to give manipulator the benefit of the doubt and see their side of things in which they blame the victim
low self-confidence - victim is self-doubting, lacking in confidence and assertiveness, likely to go on the defensive too easily.
over-intellectualization - victim tries too hard to understand and believes the manipulator has some understandable reason to be hurtful.
emotional dependency - victim has a submissive or dependent personality. The more emotionally dependent the victim is, the more vulnerable he is to being exploited and manipulated.
Manipulators generally take the time to scope out the characteristics and vulnerabilities of their victim.
According to Kantor[3], the following are vulnerable to psychopathic manipulators:
too trusting - people who are honest often assume that everyone else is honest. They commit themselves to people they hardly know without checking credentials, etc. They rarely question so-called experts.
too altruistic - the opposite of psychopathic; too honest, too fair, too empathetic
too impressionable - overly seduced by charmers. For example, they might vote for the phony politician who kisses babies.
too naïve - cannot believe there are dishonest people in the world or if there were they would not be allowed to operate.
too masochistic - lack of self-respect and unconsciously let psychopaths take advantage of them. They think they deserve it out of a sense of guilt.
too narcissistic - narcissists are prone to falling for unmerited flattery.
too greedy - the greedy and dishonest may fall prey to a psychopath who can easily entice them to act in an immoral way.
too immature - has impaired judgment and believes the exaggerated advertising claims.
too materialistic - easy prey for loan sharks or get-rich-quick schemes
too dependent - dependent people need to be loved and are therefore gullible and liable to say yes to something to which they should say no.
too lonely - lonely people may accept any offer of human contact. A psychopathic stranger may offer human companionship for a price.
too impulsive - make snap decisions about, for example, what to buy or who to marry without consulting others.
too frugal - cannot say no to a bargain even if they know the reason why it is so cheap
being elderly - the elderly can become fatigued and less capable of multi-tasking. When hearing a sales pitch they are less likely to consider that it could be a con. They are prone to giving money to someone with a hard-luck story. See elder abuse.
[edit] Motivations of manipulators
Manipulators have three possible motivations:[1]
The need to advance their own purposes and their own gain at virtually any cost to others
The manipulator has strong needs to attain feelings of power and superiority in relationships with others
Manipulators want and need to feel in control - control freakery
[edit] Psychological conditions of manipulatorsManipulators may have any of the following psychological conditions:[1]
Machiavellian personality
narcissistic personality disorder
borderline personality disorder
avoidant personality disorder
dependent personality disorder
histrionic personality disorder
passive-aggressive behavior
type A angry personalities
antisocial personality disorder
addictive personalities.
[edit] Basic manipulative strategy of a psychopath
According to Hare and Babiak[4], psychopaths are always on the lookout for individuals to scam or swindle. The psychopathic approach includes three phases:
[edit] 1. Assessment phase
Some psychopaths are opportunistic, aggressive predators who will take advantage of almost anyone they meet, while others are more patient, waiting for the perfect, innocent victim to cross their path. In each case, the psychopath is constantly sizing up the potential usefulness of an individual as a source of money, power, sex or influence. Some psychopaths enjoy a challenge while others prey on people who are vulnerable. During the assessment phase, the psychopath is able to determine a potential victim’s weak points and will use those weak points to seduce.
[edit] 2. Manipulation phase
Once the psychopath has identified a victim, the manipulation phase begins. During the manipulation phase, a psychopath may create a persona or mask, specifically designed to ‘work’ for his or her target. A psychopath will lie to gain the trust of their victim. Psychopaths' lack of empathy and guilt allows them to lie with impunity; they do not see the value of telling the truth unless it will help get them what they want.
As interaction with the victim proceeds, the psychopath carefully assesses the victim's persona. The victim's persona gives the psychopath a picture of the traits and characteristics valued in the victim. The victim's persona may also reveal, to an astute observer, insecurities or weaknesses the victim wishes to minimize or hide from view. As an ardent student of human behavior, the psychopath will then gently test the inner strengths and needs that are part of the victim's private self and eventually build a personal relationship with the victim.
The persona of the psychopath - the “personality” the victim is bonding with - does not really exist. It is built on lies, carefully woven together to entrap the victim. It is a mask, one of many, custom-made by the psychopath to fit the victim's particular psychological needs and expectations. The victimization is predatory in nature; it often leads to severe financial, physical or emotional harm for the individual. Healthy, real relationships are built on mutual respect and trust; they are based on sharing honest thoughts and feelings. The victim's mistaken belief that the psychopathic bond has any of these characteristics is the reason it is so successful.
[edit] 3. Abandonment phase
The abandonment phase begins when the psychopath decides that his or her victim is no longer useful. The psychopath abandons his or her victim and moves on to someone else. In the case of romantic relationships, a psychopath will usually seal a relationship with their next target before abandoning his or her current victim. Sometimes, the psychopath has three individuals on whom he or she is running game: the one who has been recently abandoned, who is being toyed with and kept in the picture in case the other two do not work out; the one who is currently being played and is about to be abandoned; and the third, who is being groomed by the psychopath, in anticipation of abandoning the current "mark". Abandonment can happen quickly and can occur without the current victim knowing that the psychopath was looking for someone new. There will be no apologies, or at least no sincere apologies, for the hurt and pain the psychopath causes, because psychopaths do not appreciate these emotions.
Another article on Passive Aggressive:
http://divorcesupport.about.com/od/abusiverelationships/a/Pass_Agg.htm
Passive Aggressive behavior is a form of covert abuse. When someone hits you or yells at you, you know that you've been abused. It is obvious and easily identified. Covert abuse is subtle and veiled or disguised by actions that appear to be normal, at times loving and caring. The passive aggressive person is a master at covert abuse.
Passive aggressive behavior stems from an inability to express anger in a healthy way. A person's feelings may be so repressed that they don't even realize they are angry or feeling resentment. A passive aggressive can drive people around him/her crazy and seem sincerely dismayed when confronted with their behavior. Due to their own lack of insight into their feelings the passive aggressive often feels that others misunderstand them or, are holding them to unreasonable standards if they are confronted about their behavior.
Common Passive Aggressive Behaviors:
Ambiguity: I think of the proverb, "Actions speak louder than words" when it comes to the passive aggressive and how ambiguous they can be. They rarely mean what they say or say what they mean. The best judge of how a passive aggressive feels about an issue is how they act. Normally they don't act until after they've caused some kind of stress by their ambiguous way of communicating.
Forgetfulness: The passive aggressive avoids responsibility by "forgetting." How convenient is that? There is no easier way to punish someone than forgetting that lunch date or your birthday or, better yet, an anniversary.
Blaming: They are never responsible for their actions. If you aren't to blame then it is something that happened at work, the traffic on the way home or the slow clerk at the convenience store. The passive aggressive has no faults, it is everyone around him/her who has faults and they must be punished for those faults.
Lack of Anger: He/she may never express anger. There are some who are happy with whatever you want. On the outside anyway! The passive aggressive may have been taught, as a child, that anger is unacceptable. Hence they go through life stuffing their anger, being accommodating and then sticking it to you in an under-handed way.
Fear of Dependency: From Scott Wetlzer, author of Living With The Passive Aggressive Man. "Unsure of his autonomy and afraid of being alone, he fights his dependency needs, usually by trying to control you. He wants you to think he doesn't depend on you, but he binds himself closer than he cares to admit. Relationships can become battle grounds, where he can only claim victory if he denies his need for your support."
Fear of Intimacy: The passive aggressive often can't trust. Because of this, they guard themselves against becoming intimately attached to someone. A passive aggressive will have sex with you but they rarely make love to you. If they feel themselves becoming attached, they may punish you by withholding sex.
Obstructionism: Do you want something from your passive aggressive spouse? If so, get ready to wait for it or maybe even never get it. It is important to him/her that you don,t get your way. He/she will act as if giving you what you want is important to them but, rarely will he/she follow through with giving it. It is very confusing to have someone appear to want to give to you but never follow through. You can begin to feel as if you are asking too much which is exactly what he/she wants to you to feel.
Victimization: The passive aggressive feels they are treated unfairly. If you get upset because he or she is constantly late, they take offense because; in their mind, it was someone else's fault that they were late. He/she is always the innocent victim of your unreasonable expectations, an over-bearing boss or that slow clerk at the convenience store.
Procrastination: The passive aggressive person believes that deadlines are for everyone but them. They do things on their own time schedule and be damned anyone who expects differently from them.
The Passive Aggressive and You:
The passive aggressive needs to have a relationship with someone who can be the object of his or her hostility. They need someone whose expectations and demands he/she can resist. A passive aggressive is usually attracted to co-dependents, people with low self-esteem and those who find it easy to make excuses for other's bad behaviors.
The biggest frustration in being with a passive aggressive is that they never follow through on agreements and promises. He/she will dodge responsibility for anything in the relationship while at the same time making it look as if he/she is pulling his/her own weight and is a very loving partner. The sad thing is, you can be made to believe that you are loved and adored by a person who is completely unable to form an emotional connection with anyone.
The passive aggressive ignores problems in the relationship, sees things through their own skewed sense of reality and if forced to deal with the problems will completely withdraw from the relationship and you. They will deny evidence of wrong doing, distort what you know to be real to fit their own agenda, minimize or lie so that their version of what is real seems more logical.
The passive aggressive will say one thing, do another, and then deny ever saying the first thing. They don't communicate their needs and wishes in a clear manner, expecting their spouse to read their mind and meet their needs. After all, if their spouse truly loved them he/she would just naturally know what they needed or wanted. The passive aggressive withholds information about how he/she feels, their ego is fragile and can't take the slightest criticism so why let you know what they are thinking or feeling? God forbid they disclose that information and you criticize them.
Confronting the Passive Aggressive:
Beware, if you confront the passive aggressive he/she will most likely sulk, give you the silent treatment or completely walk away leaving you standing there to deal with the problem alone. There are two reasons for confronting the passive aggressive. One, if done correctly you may be able to help him/her gain insight into the negative consequences of their behaviors. Two, even if that doesn't happen, it will at least give you the opportunity to talk to him/her in a frank way about how his/her behavior affects you. If nothing else you can get a few things "off your chest." Below are some ways you might approach your passive aggressive:
Make your feelings the subject of the conversation and not his/her bad behaviors.
Don't attack his/her character.
Make sure you have privacy.
Confront him/her about one behavior at a time, don't bring up everything at once.
If he/she needs to retreat from the conversation allow them to do it with dignity.
Have a time limit, confrontation should not stretch on indefinitely.
If he/she tries to turn the table on you, do not defend your need to have an adult conversation about your feelings.
Be sure he/she understands that you care about what happens to them, that you love them and that you are not trying to control them. You are only trying to get to the bottom of your disagreements and make the relationship better.
Inside the Passive Aggressive:
The passive aggressive has a real desire to connect with you emotionally but their fear of such a connection causes them to be obstructive and engage in self-destructive habits. He/she will be covert in their actions and it will only move him/her further from his/her desired relationship with you.
The passive aggressive never looks internally and examines their role in a relationship problem. They have to externalize it and blame others for having shortcomings. To accept that he/she has flaws would be tantamount to emotional self-destruction. They live in denial of their self-destructive behaviors, the consequences of those behaviors and the choices they make that cause others so much pain.
The passive aggressive objectifies the object of their desire. You are to be used as a means to an end. Your only value is to feed his/her own emotional needs. You are not seen as a person with feelings and needs but as an extension of him/her. They care for you the way they care for a favorite chair. You are there for their comfort and pleasure and are of use as long as you fill their needs.
The passive aggressive wants the attention and attachment that comes with loving someone but fears losing his/her independence and sense of self to his/her spouse. They want love and attention but avoid it out of fear of it destroying them. You have to be kept at arms length and if there is an emotional attachment it is tenuous at best.
The only hope for change in the way they deal with relationship issues is if they are able to acknowledge their shortcomings and contributions to the marital problems. Facing childhood wounds, looking internally instead of externally to find the cause of problems in their life will help them form deeper emotional attachments with a higher sense of emotional safety.
From the Mayo Clinic:
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/passive-aggressive-behavior/AN01563
Passive-aggressive behavior: How can I recognize it?What are the signs and symptoms of passive-aggressive behavior?
Answer
from Daniel K. Hall-Flavin, M.D.
Passive-aggressive behavior is a pattern of expressing your negative feelings in an indirect way — instead of openly addressing them.
People who are passive-aggressive appear to agree with the requests of others. They may even seem enthusiastic about them. But they don't perform a requested action on time or in a useful way, and may even work against it. In other words, they use nonverbal behavior to express anger or resentment that they can't express verbally. An example is showing up very late to a meeting that you didn't really want to attend and then making up excuses for your lateness that deflect attention from the real reason you were late.
Signs and symptoms of passive-aggressive behavior include:
Resentment and opposition to the demands of others
Complaining about feeling underappreciated or cheated
Procrastination
Stubbornness
Inefficiency
Memory lapses
Sullenness
Irritability
Cynical attitude
Although passive-aggressive behavior can be a feature of some psychiatric disorders, it isn't considered a mental illness. Researchers are studying how to classify habitual and problematic behaviors such as passive-aggressiveness. If such behavior is troublesome or interferes with your relationships or daily activities, consult a therapist who can help you identify and change the behavior.
Side note!! I was looking at other articles and was reading one about Anger Managerment (since I do get pretty damn Angry sometimes!! and the the hubby has said I have anger issues, but here is a paragraph that is relating the anger to Passive Aggressive)
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/anger-management/MH00075
"Suppression. This is an attempt to hold in or ignore your anger. You may think you shouldn't be angry or that you'll lose control if you let yourself feel any anger. The danger in this passive approach is that you may not protect yourself when the need arises. You may also become passive-aggressive, where you don't express your anger assertively or directly but scheme to retaliate because you haven't learned how to express anger constructively. "
"Can anger harm your health?
There is some evidence that inappropriately expressing anger can be harmful to your health. Whether you're overly passive and keep your anger pent up, whether you're prone to violent outbursts, or whether you're quietly seething with rage, you may have headaches, sleep difficulties, high blood pressure or digestive problems. There's even some evidence that stress and hostility related to anger can lead to heart attacks. "
So, yeah - WOW - I learned more than I thought I would! I mean, its kinda freaky and I think I need to read it a few more times to really get that deeper understanding...just because it is so broad of a subject and how it can be related to other issues or a stand alone.
Here is what I found thus far, btw, feel free to contribute or comment!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Passive%E2%80%93aggressive_behavior
Passive–aggressive behavior, a personality trait, is passive, sometimes obstructionist resistance to following through with expectations in interpersonal or occupational situations. It is a personality trait marked by a pervasive pattern of negative attitudes and passive, usually disavowed resistance in interpersonal or occupational situations.
It can manifest itself as learned helplessness, procrastination, stubbornness, resentment, sullenness, or deliberate/repeated failure to accomplish requested tasks for which one is (often explicitly) responsible
Ambiguity or speaking cryptically: a means of engendering a feeling of insecurity in others
Chronically being late and forgetting things: another way to exert control or to punish.
Fear of competition
Fear of dependency
Fear of intimacy as a means to act out anger: The passive-aggressive often cannot trust. Because of this, they guard themselves against becoming intimately attached to someone.
Making chaotic situations
Making excuses for non-performance in work teams
Obstructionism
Procrastination
Sulking
Victimization response: instead of recognizing one's own weaknesses, tendency to blame others for own failures.
A passive-aggressive person may not have all of these behaviors, and may have other[clarification needed] non-passive-aggressive traits.
Passive-aggressive personality disorder was listed as an Axis II personality disorder in the DSM-III-R, but was moved in the DSM-IV to Appendix B ("Criteria Sets and Axes Provided for Further Study") because of controversy and the need for further research on how to also categorize the behaviors in a future edition. As an alternative, the diagnosis personality disorder not otherwise specified may be used instead.
The DSM-IV Appendix B definition is as follows:[2]
A pervasive pattern of negativistic attitudes and passive resistance to demands for adequate performance, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicted by four (or more) of the following:
passively resists fulfilling routine social and occupational tasks
complains of being misunderstood and unappreciated by others
is sullen and argumentative
unreasonably criticizes and scorns authority
expresses envy and resentment toward those apparently more fortunate
voices exaggerated and persistent complaints of personal misfortune
alternates between hostile defiance and contrition
Does not occur exclusively during major depressive episodes and is not better accounted for by dysthymic disorder.
Theodore Millon identified four subtypes of negativist.[3][4] Any individual negativist may exhibit none or one of the following:
circuitous negativist – including dependent features
abrasive negativist – including sadistic features
discontented negativist – including depressive features
vacillating negativist – including borderline features
Causes:
Passive-aggressive disorder may stem from a specific childhood stimulus[5] (e.g., alcohol/drug addicted parents) in an environment where it was not safe to express frustration or anger. Families in which the honest expression of feelings is forbidden tend to teach children to repress and deny their feelings and to use other channels to express their frustration.
Children who sugarcoat their hostility may fail to ever grow beyond such behavior. Never developing better coping strategies or skills for self-expression, they can become adults who, beneath a seductive veneer, harbor vindictive intent.[6] Martin Kantor suggests three areas that contribute to passive-aggressive anger in individuals: conflicts about dependency, control, and competition.
Treatment:
Kantor suggests a treatment approach using psychodynamic, supportive, cognitive, behavioral and interpersonal therapeutic methods. These methods apply to both the passive aggressive person and their target victim.
See also
Counterproductive work behavior
Gossip
Malicious compliance
Mind games
Passivity
Psychological manipulation
Relational aggression
Social undermining
Malicious compliance
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Malicious_compliance
Malicious compliance is the behavior of a person who intentionally inflicts harm by strictly following the orders of management or following legal compulsions, knowing that compliance with the orders will cause a loss of some form resulting in damage to the manager's business or reputation, or a loss to an employee or subordinate. In effect, it is a form of sabotage used to harm leadership or used by leadership to harm subordinates.[1]
Work-to-rule is the expression of malicious compliance as an industrial action, in which rules are deliberately followed to the letter in an attempt to reduce employee productivity.
Mind games
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mind_games
The term mind games refers to passive aggressive behavior used specifically to demoralize or empower the thinking subject, often making the aggressor look superior.[citation needed]
The psychological field of transactional analysis, and in particular the Karpman drama triangle, describe and examine mind games from a social and psychological perspective. Broadly, the term can be used for any strategy or tactic where covert mental manipulation or creation of coercive pressure of another person is a goal.[citation needed]
Psychological manipulation
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychological_manipulation
Psychological manipulation is a type of social influence that aims to change the perception or behavior of others through underhanded, deceptive, or even abusive tactics.[1] By advancing the interests of the manipulator, often at the other's expense, such methods could be considered exploitative, abusive, devious, and deceptive.
Social influence is not necessarily negative. For example, doctors can try to persuade patients to change unhealthy habits. Social influence is generally perceived to be harmless when it respects the right of the influenced to accept or reject it, and is not unduly coercive. Depending on the context and motivations, social influence may constitute underhanded manipulation.
Contents [hide]
1 Requirements for successful manipulation
2 How manipulators control their victims
2.1 According to Braiker
2.2 According to Simon
3 Vulnerabilities exploited by manipulators
4 Motivations of manipulators
5 Psychological conditions of manipulators
6 Basic manipulative strategy of a psychopath
6.1 1. Assessment phase
6.2 2. Manipulation phase
6.3 3. Abandonment phase
[edit] Requirements for successful manipulation
According to Simon, successful psychological manipulation primarily involves:
manipulator concealing aggressive intentions and behaviors.
manipulator knowing the psychological vulnerabilities of the victim to determine what tactics are likely to be the most effective.
manipulator having a sufficient level of ruthlessness to have no qualms about causing harm to the victim if necessary.
Consequently the manipulation is likely to be covert (relational aggressive or passive aggressive).[2]
[edit] How manipulators control their victims[edit]
According to BraikerBraiker[1] identified the following basic ways that manipulators control their victims:
positive reinforcement - includes praise, superficial charm, superficial sympathy (crocodile tears), excessive apologizing; money, approval, gifts; attention, facial expressions such as a forced laugh or smile; public recognition.
negative reinforcement - includes nagging, yelling, the silent treatment, intimidation, threats, swearing, emotional blackmail, the guilt trap, sulking, crying, and playing the victim.
intermittent or partial reinforcement - Partial or intermittent negative reinforcement can create an effective climate of fear and doubt, for example in terrorist attacks. Partial or intermittent positive reinforcement can encourage the victim to persist - for example in most forms of gambling, the gambler is likely to win now and again but still lose money overall.
punishment
traumatic one-trial learning - using verbal abuse, explosive anger, or other intimidating behavior to establish dominance or superiority; even one incident of such behavior can condition or train victims to avoid upsetting, confronting or contradicting the manipulator.
[edit] According to Simon
Simon[2] identified the following manipulative techniques:
Lying: It is hard to tell if somebody is lying at the time they do it although often the truth may be apparent later when it is too late. One way to minimize the chances of being lied to is to understand that some personality types (particularly psychopaths) are experts at the art of lying and cheating, doing it frequently, and often in subtle ways.
Lying by omission: This is a very subtle form of lying by withholding a significant amount of the truth. This technique is also used in propaganda.
Denial: Manipulator refuses to admit that he or she has done something wrong.
Rationalization: An excuse made by the manipulator for inappropriate behavior. Rationalization is closely related to spin.
Minimization: This is a type of denial coupled with rationalization. The manipulator asserts that his or her behavior is not as harmful or irresponsible as someone else was suggesting, for example saying that a taunt or insult was only a joke.
Selective inattention or selective attention: Manipulator refuses to pay attention to anything that may distract from his or her agenda, saying things like "I don't want to hear it".
Diversion: Manipulator not giving a straight answer to a straight question and instead being diversionary, steering the conversation onto another topic.
Evasion: Similar to diversion but giving irrelevant, rambling, vague responses, weasel words.
Covert intimidation: Manipulator throwing the victim onto the defensive by using veiled (subtle, indirect or implied) threats.
Guilt tripping: A special kind of intimidation tactic. A manipulator suggests to the conscientious victim that he or she does not care enough, is too selfish or has it easy. This usually results in the victim feeling bad, keeping them in a self-doubting, anxious and submissive position.
Shaming: Manipulator uses sarcasm and put-downs to increase fear and self-doubt in the victim. Manipulators use this tactic to make others feel unworthy and therefore defer to them. Shaming tactics can be very subtle such as a fierce look or glance, unpleasant tone of voice, rhetorical comments, subtle sarcasm. Manipulators can make one feel ashamed for even daring to challenge them. It is an effective way to foster a sense of inadequacy in the victim.
Playing the victim role ("poor me"): Manipulator portrays him- or herself as a victim of circumstance or of someone else's behavior in order to gain pity, sympathy or evoke compassion and thereby get something from another. Caring and conscientious people cannot stand to see anyone suffering and the manipulator often finds it easy to play on sympathy to get cooperation.
Vilifying the victim: More than any other, this tactic is a powerful means of putting the victim on the defensive while simultaneously masking the aggressive intent of the manipulator.
Playing the servant role: Cloaking a self-serving agenda in guise of a service to a more noble cause, for example saying he is acting in a certain way for "obedience" and "service" to God or a similar authority figure.
Seduction: Manipulator uses charm, praise, flattery or overtly supporting others in order to get them to lower their defenses and give their trust and loyalty to him or her.
Projecting the blame (blaming others): Manipulator scapegoats in often subtle, hard to detect ways.
Feigning innocence: Manipulator tries to suggest that any harm done was unintentional or did not do something that they were accused of. Manipulator may put on a look of surprise or indignation. This tactic makes the victim question his or her own judgment and possibly his own sanity.
Feigning confusion: Manipulator tries to play dumb by pretending he or she does not know what you are talking about or is confused about an important issue brought to his attention.
Brandishing anger: Manipulator uses anger to brandish sufficient emotional intensity and rage to shock the victim into submission. The manipulator is not actually angry, he or she just puts on an act. He just wants what he wants and gets "angry" when denied.
[edit] Vulnerabilities exploited by manipulators
According to Braiker[1], manipulators exploit the following vulnerabilities (buttons) that may exist in victims:
the "disease to please"
addiction to earning the approval and acceptance of others
Emotophobia (fear of negative emotion)
lack of assertiveness and ability to say no
blurry sense of identity (with soft personal boundaries)
low self-reliance
external locus of control
According to Simon[2], manipulators exploit the following vulnerabilities that may exist in victims:
naïveté - victim finds it too hard to accept the idea that some people are cunning, devious and ruthless or is "in denial" if he is being victimized
over-conscientiousness - victim is too willing to give manipulator the benefit of the doubt and see their side of things in which they blame the victim
low self-confidence - victim is self-doubting, lacking in confidence and assertiveness, likely to go on the defensive too easily.
over-intellectualization - victim tries too hard to understand and believes the manipulator has some understandable reason to be hurtful.
emotional dependency - victim has a submissive or dependent personality. The more emotionally dependent the victim is, the more vulnerable he is to being exploited and manipulated.
Manipulators generally take the time to scope out the characteristics and vulnerabilities of their victim.
According to Kantor[3], the following are vulnerable to psychopathic manipulators:
too trusting - people who are honest often assume that everyone else is honest. They commit themselves to people they hardly know without checking credentials, etc. They rarely question so-called experts.
too altruistic - the opposite of psychopathic; too honest, too fair, too empathetic
too impressionable - overly seduced by charmers. For example, they might vote for the phony politician who kisses babies.
too naïve - cannot believe there are dishonest people in the world or if there were they would not be allowed to operate.
too masochistic - lack of self-respect and unconsciously let psychopaths take advantage of them. They think they deserve it out of a sense of guilt.
too narcissistic - narcissists are prone to falling for unmerited flattery.
too greedy - the greedy and dishonest may fall prey to a psychopath who can easily entice them to act in an immoral way.
too immature - has impaired judgment and believes the exaggerated advertising claims.
too materialistic - easy prey for loan sharks or get-rich-quick schemes
too dependent - dependent people need to be loved and are therefore gullible and liable to say yes to something to which they should say no.
too lonely - lonely people may accept any offer of human contact. A psychopathic stranger may offer human companionship for a price.
too impulsive - make snap decisions about, for example, what to buy or who to marry without consulting others.
too frugal - cannot say no to a bargain even if they know the reason why it is so cheap
being elderly - the elderly can become fatigued and less capable of multi-tasking. When hearing a sales pitch they are less likely to consider that it could be a con. They are prone to giving money to someone with a hard-luck story. See elder abuse.
[edit] Motivations of manipulators
Manipulators have three possible motivations:[1]
The need to advance their own purposes and their own gain at virtually any cost to others
The manipulator has strong needs to attain feelings of power and superiority in relationships with others
Manipulators want and need to feel in control - control freakery
[edit] Psychological conditions of manipulatorsManipulators may have any of the following psychological conditions:[1]
Machiavellian personality
narcissistic personality disorder
borderline personality disorder
avoidant personality disorder
dependent personality disorder
histrionic personality disorder
passive-aggressive behavior
type A angry personalities
antisocial personality disorder
addictive personalities.
[edit] Basic manipulative strategy of a psychopath
According to Hare and Babiak[4], psychopaths are always on the lookout for individuals to scam or swindle. The psychopathic approach includes three phases:
[edit] 1. Assessment phase
Some psychopaths are opportunistic, aggressive predators who will take advantage of almost anyone they meet, while others are more patient, waiting for the perfect, innocent victim to cross their path. In each case, the psychopath is constantly sizing up the potential usefulness of an individual as a source of money, power, sex or influence. Some psychopaths enjoy a challenge while others prey on people who are vulnerable. During the assessment phase, the psychopath is able to determine a potential victim’s weak points and will use those weak points to seduce.
[edit] 2. Manipulation phase
Once the psychopath has identified a victim, the manipulation phase begins. During the manipulation phase, a psychopath may create a persona or mask, specifically designed to ‘work’ for his or her target. A psychopath will lie to gain the trust of their victim. Psychopaths' lack of empathy and guilt allows them to lie with impunity; they do not see the value of telling the truth unless it will help get them what they want.
As interaction with the victim proceeds, the psychopath carefully assesses the victim's persona. The victim's persona gives the psychopath a picture of the traits and characteristics valued in the victim. The victim's persona may also reveal, to an astute observer, insecurities or weaknesses the victim wishes to minimize or hide from view. As an ardent student of human behavior, the psychopath will then gently test the inner strengths and needs that are part of the victim's private self and eventually build a personal relationship with the victim.
The persona of the psychopath - the “personality” the victim is bonding with - does not really exist. It is built on lies, carefully woven together to entrap the victim. It is a mask, one of many, custom-made by the psychopath to fit the victim's particular psychological needs and expectations. The victimization is predatory in nature; it often leads to severe financial, physical or emotional harm for the individual. Healthy, real relationships are built on mutual respect and trust; they are based on sharing honest thoughts and feelings. The victim's mistaken belief that the psychopathic bond has any of these characteristics is the reason it is so successful.
[edit] 3. Abandonment phase
The abandonment phase begins when the psychopath decides that his or her victim is no longer useful. The psychopath abandons his or her victim and moves on to someone else. In the case of romantic relationships, a psychopath will usually seal a relationship with their next target before abandoning his or her current victim. Sometimes, the psychopath has three individuals on whom he or she is running game: the one who has been recently abandoned, who is being toyed with and kept in the picture in case the other two do not work out; the one who is currently being played and is about to be abandoned; and the third, who is being groomed by the psychopath, in anticipation of abandoning the current "mark". Abandonment can happen quickly and can occur without the current victim knowing that the psychopath was looking for someone new. There will be no apologies, or at least no sincere apologies, for the hurt and pain the psychopath causes, because psychopaths do not appreciate these emotions.
Another article on Passive Aggressive:
http://divorcesupport.about.com/od/abusiverelationships/a/Pass_Agg.htm
Passive Aggressive behavior is a form of covert abuse. When someone hits you or yells at you, you know that you've been abused. It is obvious and easily identified. Covert abuse is subtle and veiled or disguised by actions that appear to be normal, at times loving and caring. The passive aggressive person is a master at covert abuse.
Passive aggressive behavior stems from an inability to express anger in a healthy way. A person's feelings may be so repressed that they don't even realize they are angry or feeling resentment. A passive aggressive can drive people around him/her crazy and seem sincerely dismayed when confronted with their behavior. Due to their own lack of insight into their feelings the passive aggressive often feels that others misunderstand them or, are holding them to unreasonable standards if they are confronted about their behavior.
Common Passive Aggressive Behaviors:
Ambiguity: I think of the proverb, "Actions speak louder than words" when it comes to the passive aggressive and how ambiguous they can be. They rarely mean what they say or say what they mean. The best judge of how a passive aggressive feels about an issue is how they act. Normally they don't act until after they've caused some kind of stress by their ambiguous way of communicating.
Forgetfulness: The passive aggressive avoids responsibility by "forgetting." How convenient is that? There is no easier way to punish someone than forgetting that lunch date or your birthday or, better yet, an anniversary.
Blaming: They are never responsible for their actions. If you aren't to blame then it is something that happened at work, the traffic on the way home or the slow clerk at the convenience store. The passive aggressive has no faults, it is everyone around him/her who has faults and they must be punished for those faults.
Lack of Anger: He/she may never express anger. There are some who are happy with whatever you want. On the outside anyway! The passive aggressive may have been taught, as a child, that anger is unacceptable. Hence they go through life stuffing their anger, being accommodating and then sticking it to you in an under-handed way.
Fear of Dependency: From Scott Wetlzer, author of Living With The Passive Aggressive Man. "Unsure of his autonomy and afraid of being alone, he fights his dependency needs, usually by trying to control you. He wants you to think he doesn't depend on you, but he binds himself closer than he cares to admit. Relationships can become battle grounds, where he can only claim victory if he denies his need for your support."
Fear of Intimacy: The passive aggressive often can't trust. Because of this, they guard themselves against becoming intimately attached to someone. A passive aggressive will have sex with you but they rarely make love to you. If they feel themselves becoming attached, they may punish you by withholding sex.
Obstructionism: Do you want something from your passive aggressive spouse? If so, get ready to wait for it or maybe even never get it. It is important to him/her that you don,t get your way. He/she will act as if giving you what you want is important to them but, rarely will he/she follow through with giving it. It is very confusing to have someone appear to want to give to you but never follow through. You can begin to feel as if you are asking too much which is exactly what he/she wants to you to feel.
Victimization: The passive aggressive feels they are treated unfairly. If you get upset because he or she is constantly late, they take offense because; in their mind, it was someone else's fault that they were late. He/she is always the innocent victim of your unreasonable expectations, an over-bearing boss or that slow clerk at the convenience store.
Procrastination: The passive aggressive person believes that deadlines are for everyone but them. They do things on their own time schedule and be damned anyone who expects differently from them.
The Passive Aggressive and You:
The passive aggressive needs to have a relationship with someone who can be the object of his or her hostility. They need someone whose expectations and demands he/she can resist. A passive aggressive is usually attracted to co-dependents, people with low self-esteem and those who find it easy to make excuses for other's bad behaviors.
The biggest frustration in being with a passive aggressive is that they never follow through on agreements and promises. He/she will dodge responsibility for anything in the relationship while at the same time making it look as if he/she is pulling his/her own weight and is a very loving partner. The sad thing is, you can be made to believe that you are loved and adored by a person who is completely unable to form an emotional connection with anyone.
The passive aggressive ignores problems in the relationship, sees things through their own skewed sense of reality and if forced to deal with the problems will completely withdraw from the relationship and you. They will deny evidence of wrong doing, distort what you know to be real to fit their own agenda, minimize or lie so that their version of what is real seems more logical.
The passive aggressive will say one thing, do another, and then deny ever saying the first thing. They don't communicate their needs and wishes in a clear manner, expecting their spouse to read their mind and meet their needs. After all, if their spouse truly loved them he/she would just naturally know what they needed or wanted. The passive aggressive withholds information about how he/she feels, their ego is fragile and can't take the slightest criticism so why let you know what they are thinking or feeling? God forbid they disclose that information and you criticize them.
Confronting the Passive Aggressive:
Beware, if you confront the passive aggressive he/she will most likely sulk, give you the silent treatment or completely walk away leaving you standing there to deal with the problem alone. There are two reasons for confronting the passive aggressive. One, if done correctly you may be able to help him/her gain insight into the negative consequences of their behaviors. Two, even if that doesn't happen, it will at least give you the opportunity to talk to him/her in a frank way about how his/her behavior affects you. If nothing else you can get a few things "off your chest." Below are some ways you might approach your passive aggressive:
Make your feelings the subject of the conversation and not his/her bad behaviors.
Don't attack his/her character.
Make sure you have privacy.
Confront him/her about one behavior at a time, don't bring up everything at once.
If he/she needs to retreat from the conversation allow them to do it with dignity.
Have a time limit, confrontation should not stretch on indefinitely.
If he/she tries to turn the table on you, do not defend your need to have an adult conversation about your feelings.
Be sure he/she understands that you care about what happens to them, that you love them and that you are not trying to control them. You are only trying to get to the bottom of your disagreements and make the relationship better.
Inside the Passive Aggressive:
The passive aggressive has a real desire to connect with you emotionally but their fear of such a connection causes them to be obstructive and engage in self-destructive habits. He/she will be covert in their actions and it will only move him/her further from his/her desired relationship with you.
The passive aggressive never looks internally and examines their role in a relationship problem. They have to externalize it and blame others for having shortcomings. To accept that he/she has flaws would be tantamount to emotional self-destruction. They live in denial of their self-destructive behaviors, the consequences of those behaviors and the choices they make that cause others so much pain.
The passive aggressive objectifies the object of their desire. You are to be used as a means to an end. Your only value is to feed his/her own emotional needs. You are not seen as a person with feelings and needs but as an extension of him/her. They care for you the way they care for a favorite chair. You are there for their comfort and pleasure and are of use as long as you fill their needs.
The passive aggressive wants the attention and attachment that comes with loving someone but fears losing his/her independence and sense of self to his/her spouse. They want love and attention but avoid it out of fear of it destroying them. You have to be kept at arms length and if there is an emotional attachment it is tenuous at best.
The only hope for change in the way they deal with relationship issues is if they are able to acknowledge their shortcomings and contributions to the marital problems. Facing childhood wounds, looking internally instead of externally to find the cause of problems in their life will help them form deeper emotional attachments with a higher sense of emotional safety.
From the Mayo Clinic:
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/passive-aggressive-behavior/AN01563
Passive-aggressive behavior: How can I recognize it?What are the signs and symptoms of passive-aggressive behavior?
Answer
from Daniel K. Hall-Flavin, M.D.
Passive-aggressive behavior is a pattern of expressing your negative feelings in an indirect way — instead of openly addressing them.
People who are passive-aggressive appear to agree with the requests of others. They may even seem enthusiastic about them. But they don't perform a requested action on time or in a useful way, and may even work against it. In other words, they use nonverbal behavior to express anger or resentment that they can't express verbally. An example is showing up very late to a meeting that you didn't really want to attend and then making up excuses for your lateness that deflect attention from the real reason you were late.
Signs and symptoms of passive-aggressive behavior include:
Resentment and opposition to the demands of others
Complaining about feeling underappreciated or cheated
Procrastination
Stubbornness
Inefficiency
Memory lapses
Sullenness
Irritability
Cynical attitude
Although passive-aggressive behavior can be a feature of some psychiatric disorders, it isn't considered a mental illness. Researchers are studying how to classify habitual and problematic behaviors such as passive-aggressiveness. If such behavior is troublesome or interferes with your relationships or daily activities, consult a therapist who can help you identify and change the behavior.
Side note!! I was looking at other articles and was reading one about Anger Managerment (since I do get pretty damn Angry sometimes!! and the the hubby has said I have anger issues, but here is a paragraph that is relating the anger to Passive Aggressive)
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/anger-management/MH00075
"Suppression. This is an attempt to hold in or ignore your anger. You may think you shouldn't be angry or that you'll lose control if you let yourself feel any anger. The danger in this passive approach is that you may not protect yourself when the need arises. You may also become passive-aggressive, where you don't express your anger assertively or directly but scheme to retaliate because you haven't learned how to express anger constructively. "
"Can anger harm your health?
There is some evidence that inappropriately expressing anger can be harmful to your health. Whether you're overly passive and keep your anger pent up, whether you're prone to violent outbursts, or whether you're quietly seething with rage, you may have headaches, sleep difficulties, high blood pressure or digestive problems. There's even some evidence that stress and hostility related to anger can lead to heart attacks. "
So, yeah - WOW - I learned more than I thought I would! I mean, its kinda freaky and I think I need to read it a few more times to really get that deeper understanding...just because it is so broad of a subject and how it can be related to other issues or a stand alone.
Labels:
Aggressive,
disavowed resistance,
negative attitude,
Passive,
Passive Aggressive,
Personality Trait
10.04.2010
Books read and reading
I finished last night, Wicked Intentions, by Elizabeth Hoyt. It was a pretty good read, but you really had to get past the 1st half of the book. It was a slow beginning, thats for sure! But, I could have sworn I read her stuff before and liked her, so I kept going. Which I am glad I did!! As a reader, you could get a possible idea of what was going to happen :) And I could almost, ALMOST guess who the villian was at the end...because damn the clues kept coming back to one person. It was good a story, some parts pretty steamy :) I liked it and I would read another by her.
So, since I am done with that, I started in on another book, one I actually bought (yes, the library is my friend!) this weekend...
This is one that is a sequel "The Magicians and Mrs. Quent". So far, I am liking it. Again, it seems a little bit slow so far...but this may be because I got spoiled by all these active packed novels by Cherry Adair (btw, I have about 6 of those waiting at the library to be picked up!). So, the "House on Durrow Street" is by Galen Beckett. Its not your typical type of location/time line, which I like because it is different.. Its sorta a cross between old London or Victorian but not on this Earth, with magic and elemental stuff going on. I recommend both of them. I won't go into the story line much, you can just click on the links and Amazon has enough listed to give the gist :)
Depending on soon I get to the library, the next week might be just Cherry Adair novels :)
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