A lot of little things

Ok, so life is all over the place lately.

Since I am now officially divorced (YAY) I can legally change my last name. Now, first I must got to Social Security to do this, then the DMV and after that, it's everything from my bank accounts/credit cards, to house/car titles to ordering new checks to work and anything I've ever used my married last name for (like LinkedIn). I need to make a fucking list.

I am also in the process of opening an IRA account for the money that is from the Ex per the divorce. Who knew that can take such a process, and don't you know, it's smarter to wait until my name is changed.

My nephew's mother is a piece of work and is now stating she can't raise her son, again. I have no idea what's going to happen, I just know that last time is was painful and hard to change our lives into a new family when we took him. Got him fit, changed his outlook, started really teaching him positive things and then she demanded him back 4 months later. And not even 2 months goes by and she's all - I was wrong to take him back. I told her (and everyone) that he has to go into the foster care system. That she has to really give him up. Because I am not a yo-yo and this poor kid has already been too through to fucking much to keep on doing shit to him. And if I could be his foster mom, that is better than informal kinship without much help. Ugh. And honestly, right now, that's sadly a big IF. He's a great kid, in that he can be a great kid. He's a smart mouth, a know-it-all, and exhausting. He deserves better than he's gotten, but I can't change the past. I don't even know if I can help him now. Until you raise someone else's kid, you have no idea how different and hard it is. How much you change and sacrifice and at the end of it still feel like whatever you do won't matter...he has the gene's of my drug addict/alcoholic brother and his always-theVictim/NoResponsibility-manipulative mother.  That is a tall fucking order. But wait, let me know rearrange my whole life (again) and possibly damage my relationship and hope my 13 yo son isn't a constant prick, because I'm the only one available. That makes me feel awesome, not. I'm already a single parent. I remember lots of time crying in the shower because I was so stressed. I know that part of that was IN PART because he really thought this was temporary (and oh look it was) and he didn't see the point of making a connection. I have no idea if he's going to make a connection. Who wants to raise someone who doesn't WANT to connect with you. That hurts. Why, again, would I want to do that??????? Because he's my nephew? My brother's son? Because it's not his fault his parents are assholes and he's gotten the shaft for the last 9 years? I just don't know...

My son is 13, and his hormones are like a permanent case of PMS. I never know when he's going to have a melt down, which includes throwing a 5'8" sized temper tantrum, cussing and yelling, stalking off and slamming doors and then crying. And then apologizing for being a dickhead. Ugh.

And throwing a traumatized 9 year old into that? Ugh.

And trying to get house/home/yard cleaned, organized, anything on top of that? LOL. I need more energy it seems. Or something.

School starts Wednesday.

I was contemplating going back to college, actually get a degree.

At least I am getting my period still, on a regular basis. For over a year now. That says something to me in a very profound way.

I think for right now, I am going to keep my goals small. Keep my life simple. I only want complicated in the books I read.

I have a lot of thinking to do.

I am looking forward at least to a couple things. The Maryland Renaissance Festival and a mini vacation to Myrtle Beach.

Multi update

Let's see.

I have 1 tomato that is almost ready to come off the vine :) And ton more growing !! I also pulled off 1 bell pepper :) Can't wait to cook it !

I have major tooth pain so even if I take the tomato off the vine, I can't eat it.

I cleaned my kitchen this weekend (I always feel better for some reason when it's clean)

Will be doing back to school shopping soon, since it starts on the 20th.

I am pretty sure I am going to go back to school and at least get my Associates Degree (ha, I had thought to write AA degree, but that might be misconstrued!) Have to figure that out though and fast.

I got my divorce paperwork in - SCORE - which means I will now start the process of officially changing my last name. Very very excited (it's a bitch though, I know). It feels more official once the paper came in :)

My body is in this whole reaction to last weeks stresses though. Between the poison ivy/oak (ugh, I will post pics on that soon enough) a different skin infection brewing and my tooth, you would think I would be miserable. And honestly, fuck that. Why be miserable - even with all that crap?? It's not like being miserable is going to make it better, or change it! Do I need a woo-is-moment? Yep sometimes I do, but after that you gotta just move on!

I read a book this weekend (which is awesome considering how much I haven't been reading as late) so I am hoping to post a book review on that this week. I really should update my goodreads account and get it current O.o

August seems to be packed with things we're doing! I almost think it's like the start of a season - the upcoming months have birthdays, holidays, outings, mini vacations and all kinds of goodness happening.

I found a ring I have lost in the last week, which makes me happy because I really really love this ring. It's not anything special, just I love it.

Work is awesome. Love my job. Boyfriend is awesome. Love him. Kid is awesome. Love him. My cats, well they are awesome but also annoying and sweet and still adjusting to updating their diets. Love them

Life is good :)

Not Just A Witch

So I changed my blog name from FaeryChaos, to Not Just A Witch...

And you may wonder why.

Being a witch is part of who I am. A large part of how I think (love love love Karma), how I feel (Balance) and where I am going in life.

As I was perusing several other blogs today and seeing who they follow (pagan ones today) and I saw a lot of 'witchy' stuff out there, which is to me, full of the awesome. It got me thinking though about me and mine and my Faery Chaos is part of me (Faeries can be some serious little tricksters and not always nice - they bite! Chaos is needed in life, just as much as Order) but all of I sudden I felt this "I'm not just a witch. I'm not just a mom, or just a working mom, or just a wife, or just a sister. I am ALL of those things and then some" and decided to change my blog. Of course, I could have done something like "Not just a Mom" too, but my witchiness was all there so that's what I put.

I may write more on this later, when I actually HAVE time.