Excited and Nervous

 So. This weekend is going to be it. It's going to be energy drinks, Advil and whatever is needed to get through it and get shit done.

The house needs to be finished - and this means cleaning everything I haven't cleaned. It means carpet cleaning upstairs. It means painting the last 2 rooms after they are patched. Oy.

It means the yard needs to be cleaned up and all the trash taken away.

That is the nervous part, being done and ready enough. 

Then, then my house, my home - will be listed for sale.

It's kinda mind boggling in one sense. I've lived here almost 8 years, a lot of memories are from here. With Raven, with my love, with my niece and others. I'm not attached, not in the sense that I am re-thinking the decision to move (because, not I am ready to move on) but so many significant things have happened here. And I am thankful for having such a warm house, one that has been filled with loud voices and loud love. Life.

And this weekend doesn't even include the work that needs to fix the porch. Or that cost. Nor does it include fixing the fence. Or that cost/hard work.

Jesus, selling a house is an expensive endeavor. 

BUT, one that I need to do. Which makes me excited. I want to sell, and change living situations. And it will be the first time that I don't have school, a kid, or a house, that needs me. I will have TIME.

Don't get me wrong, I fucking miss my son like no ones fucking business, but he's an adult and figuring his own self out. He is also amazing. I hope I get to see him at some point and hug him and enough spending TIME with him.

I am excited for a LOT of reasons :) But the overall joy is about shifting and moving forward. Forward is good. Forward is not stagnant or paused and I like forward for a lot of different reasons.

After this weekend, it's all about tackling the attic and getting that situated :) Not a horrible thing to get accomplished in the next couple weeks.

I am so lucky. And thankful. And happy. Life is good!